Slay The Narrator: Chapter 1 - The New Prisoner (parody/fan fiction)

[glider521al (Rogue Worlds dev)]

There is now a visual version on Reddit:
https://www.reddit.com/r/slaytheprincess/comments/1b4gj1a/slay_the_narrator_the_new_prisoner_fan_parody/

A warning before we go further this parody mixes in-game quotes and vessels with fan fiction (end game spoilers are marked, though it's still advisable to finish the game first). The narrator may lie, he may cheat, he will offer to save the world. And If he’s not careful, he will meet his demise over and over again. We’re here to parody the Narrator, he’s in for a surprise…

Suggestions for inclusion are welcome

The Narrator: You're on a path..No that's not right..I'm on a path through the woods? What the..

Voice of the Hero: He doesn't seem to remember what happened, probably best we keep it that way.

Voice of the Cold: Oh, this is going to be fun!

The Narrator: What are you on about, it feels like you’re no longer connected to this body? Is this the same body? In fact, why am I in control..not that I’m complaining.

Voice of the Contrarian: Oh ho ho, Yeah we definitely shouldn’t give You spoilers, like how you brought you back! Or how the tables have turned! Or how everyone else controls the narrative now!

The Narrator: Controls the..You are Not taking My job. You didn’t even put a chapter name up!

Voice of the Hero: Yeah we weren’t sure what name You’d like. We thought of “A Horrible Sense of De Ja Vu”, but that sounded too pessimistic.

Voice of the Contrarian: We also thought of Orientation, but that would give away details and We wouldn’t want that..

The Narrator: Well I’m already getting some spoilers from your open conversations. So why don’t you start by telling me everything that’s going on?

Player:
→ We have a surprise for you in the cabin (Explore)
- Yeah I definitely shouldn’t mention any more spoilers like that we found that the princess was immortal, definitely shouldn’t tell you We saved her or that I awoke to my identity as The Long Quiet and eventually ascended with her to a new universe!
- Forget the deal, let's tell him everything.
- [Slay the Narrator]
- (Stay silent and see how things play out.)

The Narrator: A Surprise? You’re being cagey, what aren’t you telling me?

Voice of the Contrarian: That used to be one of our lines Narrator.

The Narrator: (sigh), fine I trek down the path and into the cabin.
The cabin interior is bare. The only furniture of note is a plain wooden table and perched on top of that table is..nothing? Where’s the pristine blade? Does that mean you’ve already done your job?

Voice of the Hero: Well..

Voice of the Hunted: Shhh, you’re going to ruin the surprise.

CHAPTER 1 - The New Prisoner

The Narrator: What’s that meant to mean?

Voice of the Contrarian: Well you said you wanted a title card

Voice of the Hero: We also didn’t really get to pick the title

Voice of the Opportunist: But it was selected democratically

The Narrator: Well, if you’re not going to tell me anything, I’ll find out myself. I open the door, striding down the steps looking forward to seeing a princess who’s been slain..


I feel icy cold fingers dance across my shoulders, I turn around and see nothing. Then spin back around and see a ghostly figure with a skeletal grin pass through the walls.

The Spectre: Oh, it’s you. Hiya killer, I had some issues with how our last meeting went.
The Spectre [swapping to her menacing face]: Well ALL our meetings actually!
[she reverts to her regular face] Come to make sure you finished the job or what?

The Narrator: Things are..strange right now, is she..?

Voice of the Cold: Wouldn't you consider a ghost dead?

The Narrator: Let's not argue of the semantics over what is or isn't dead. She's clearly floating right in front of me.

The Spectre: Maybe the bossy one doesn’t hate me, maybe You even like me? Maybe You’re trying to make amends, too.

The Narrator: "Not at all. I'll have you know that I do hate you, and I will continue to hate you for so long as I am able."

The Spectre (with a blank look): Well then I guess We’re stuck with you for a very long, long, long, long time.

The Narrator: I feel a cold and slightly painful sensation as her spectral form passes through my chest and head. She is now nowhere to be seen.

Voice of the Cold: Obviously she’s nowhere to be seen, she just phased through the wall next to you.

The Narrator: I’m setting the stage! Confused, and annoyed, I trek down the stairs and see another ghostly figure, hovering high and out of reach, this time cloaked in black, the Pristine blade sticking out of her chest.

The Narrator: What’s going on? Did you even do the slaying properly!?

Player:
-> How were We meant to do it? (Explore)
- Nope! I didn’t trust a voice in my head telling me to commit homicide
- Uh, Yep..definitely
- Sorta, We slayed each other for a while, than found that We were both immortal and we resolved our differences
- You’ll see..
- [Slay the Narrator yourself]
- [Silence]

The Narrator: As in, Did you make sure to believe it was done afterwards?

The Grey Bold of you to come back here after what you did.

The Narrator: What I did?

The Grey:You made Me and your hero kill each other over and over again.

The Narrator: I’d never make you kill him.

The Grey: [Stares]

The Narrator: So, How dead are You?

The Grey: [Glares]

The Narrator: "Glare at me all you want! You were going to destroy the world!"

The Grey: [Glare intensifies]

The Narrator: "Anyway, If he died, his blood is squarely on your hands! Screw this! I’m going to need a way to get that blade back..did I just say that out loud?"

The Grey: Pathetic.

The Narrator: She fades away, and the pristine blade clatters unceremoniously to the floor. I pick up the blade. Suddenly the door creaks open behind me..a torrent of water rushes down the stairs and sweeps me along with it until I collide with the hard stone floor of the landing. The basement appears to be somehow patched together from a wooden cabin on one side and a stone prison from the landing onwards.

I..rise from the cold basement floor ..disorientated..wet..my vision slowly returning. I squint at the other side of the room and see..

Another Princess?! You had one task, did you clowns even do it at all!?

Voice of the Cold: Well now’s your chance to show us, Narrator.

The Prisoner: Hey! I thought we weren’t going to give the whole game away. Oh well, anyway.
What an interesting development. We should sit and chat before you bury that blade in my heart.

The Narrator: I tighten my grip on the blade and stare at The Princess, she squints back.

The Prisoner: Not one for small talk? I’m not either, but I’ve grown to tolerate it. I’ve learnt new abilities to, perhaps I could summon you a drink? If the basement floor’s too uncomfortable you could always try that shackle over there.

The Narrator: She gestures to a large neck brace, a couple of meters away from her.

The Prisoner (smiling darkly): Maybe you should try it on, maybe it will fit. Either way, I’ll fill you in on how orientation is going to work.

The Narrator: "No, no, I’m here to slay her! I charge forward, blade aimed at her chest."

The Prisoner Oh you bastard, you’re going to regret saying that!

The Narrator: The blade clashes against the chains as she blocks the blow again and again. In an instant, the other chain is around My...

[starts throttling narrator with chain]
The Prisoner: Drop the blade, or you die!

[The Narrator tries to slide the knife into her rib cage]

The Prisoner: I’ve seen that move before, it won’t work this time

[Twists chain around narrator’s hand].
I told you that you'd regret that. But I didn't think you'd regret it so fast. And with so little effort on my part. I didn’t even have to use any power.

The Narrator: I watch powerless to move as the shackle around the Princess’s other wrist rusts away as though being eaten by time itself. How?
With her free hand she holds me up at arms length by the scruff of the neck, though releasing the chains around me.

The Prisoner: Let me make this clear to you. You can either be civil and chat. Or if you insist on slaying, well..; We’ll kill you, as many times as it takes.

The Narrator: "Who’s 'We'? I throw the knife at The Princess."

The Prisoner: Which, I casually block with the other chain. You know, it’s pretty obvious what you’re planning to do if You say it aloud each time. I guess violence is the only language you speak.

[The Prisoner slams his forehead against the wall]

The Narrator: Everything goes black and I die.

[Some hours later]

Voice of the Skeptic: Narrator, We’ve tested this body, it’s survived much worse than being bashed against the wall.

The Narrator: Fine.
As I regain consciousness, I find myself once again in the basement where I left off. There is no sign of the Princess. Looking around I see that all her shackles are broken..all except one, now around my wrist..Dammit, she’s chained me to the wall hasn’t she?

Voice of the Contrarian: How came you to that conclussion?

The Narrator: Call it deductive reasoning. Who else would it have been.
Voice of the Skeptic: "I think now’s a good time to check your pockets for a note you wrote yourself, before you lost your memory."

The Narrator: [Pulls out envelope]: “Wait? How do I know this wasn’t forged, I don't remember my writing being this messy?”

Voice of the Skeptic: “As you would put it ‘You just have to trust me.” Wink

Handwritten Note titled ‘The Immutable Truth’:
“I’m going to be here for a while, stuck in orientation.
I am reaping what I’ve sown
May as well get used to it.
-Signed The Narrator.”

The Narrator: What the..

[glider521al (Rogue Worlds dev)]

Chapter 2 - Nightmares (Extract)

The Narrator: "What's that meant to mean? Unlike you, I'm not capable of having nightmares."
...

The Narrator: She's not the only one with powers over this Construct.
Voice of the Hero:What?
The Narrator:Uh, forget you heard that, I'm not giving My plan away.
Just how many versions of her are there anyway? If I'm to find out that you're in any way in league with her, I'd rather not face whatever's next..sober.
The Princess Not so fun being chained to a wall is it? Don't worry Narrator, You'll get out..soon enough.

[To be continued...]
The Narrator: No! You can't leave this unfinished, what kind of...

Background

Thanks for reading

Suggestions/Corrections are welcome, will likely make a few more edits before finalising chapter 1 in a couple of days.

Firstly thank you to the developers at Tabby Games for making a wonderful game and well characters and narrative. Also thank you to the fantastic community on the forum, Reddit and elsewhere for sharing quotes, stories and artwork. I was inspired by the writing of butterenergy (After The End series) Fanatical_Obsession (Thorn series) and other FanFic authors.

I started writing in January and was initially planning on releasing 2-3 chapters simultaneously later on (likely after the Pristine Cut or after our own indie game was released). However after seeing another story by Young_Person_42 on swapping roles I got inspired to post.

Have always been interested in exploring the idea of the Narrator dealing with laser guided Karma and what would happen if they bought him back long after the events of the game (The Princess wouldn't be so keen without some conditions attached..).