FAQ: Yes, We Support Kinect

[Strange Scaffold]

Q: ...This game supports Kinect?
Yes! On PC only, if you plug in a Kinect 2.0 to your computer while the game is open, you can play through the entirety of the game using Kinect controls. Grab meat with your meat hands! Your body is the controller! We live in the future. Good luck.

Q: Is Kinect the optimal way to play Space Warlord Organ Trading Simulator?
Absolutely not.

Q: Why would I play a fast-paced reflex-based economic tycoon using Kinect?
I have no earthly idea, but I am personally sending the first person to direct message me documented proof of using a Kinect to play through the entirety of the campaign (reaching the "The Top 0.1%" reputation level) a $50 Steam gift card. Primarily so I can meet the kind of person who would do that to themselves, and plead with them for mercy lest they destroy us all.

Q: How did you put Kinect support into a game in 2021?
I work with a brilliant, slightly unhinged creative programmer named Sam Chiet, and one day, at 3 AM, I blearily opened my phone to find a video of the game working with full functionality on a Kinect. And a tablet. And a Wiimote. You know, for the Nintendo Wii (2007).

He apparently did all of those experiments in one night just because he could, and has since dedicated a large portion of his time to single-handedly becoming the final Kinect developer. I decided the safest option was to stay out of his way.

Q: Why did you put Kinect support into a game in 2021?
I embrace the Sun with arms outstretched so that my oblivion will be one of my own choosing.

Q: Why don't you advertise this more?
Us being a small team and the Kinect being a (largely defunct) peripheral, promising support for an interesting novelty option would be dangerous. So, we included the feature, and dearly hope you enjoy it, but caution that you use it at your own risk. If you encounter problems with the Kinect... it's unlikely we can help. My apologies.

Also, Microsoft is one of the largest corporations on the planet. I'm not going to tell them our team resurrected an object they personally attempted to bury--are you?

TL;DR:
Thank you for supporting our strange space-based organ trading game. Yes, you can play it with Kinect 2.0. And we wish you luck if you try.