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Picking the "I want to talk outside." or w/e similar relationship option moves you to a new dialogue where you actually choose to make a Veiled Vow (marked with a sakura blossom) or not. Saying nevermind still rewards you the character's special accessory. If you've been avoiding those dialogues entirely (the one's that are like "let's talk, just the two of us") you might be missing out on some other stuff like bond missions. Again, the game makes it clear when it'll actually affect your Veiled Vow status with the blossom icon.
You basically just gift people sims style until they like you and then you get two mediocre cutscenes and that's that.
You can't summon your love interest to your longhouse at will, nor are there any further activities with them. They become worst type of soulless husk NPC.
Given there's a "break up" option, they're pretty much a collectible and you can hook up with all of them in a single playthrough.