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So you mean, i should gift her and kiss her and talk to her in the morning, so that the interactions are done with her and then go to the date in the evening? Do i understand that right? Honestly I don´t think it works this way, but i will try this out when i come across the next b-day from one of them.
What I try to do is do some regular day-to-day dating to drive up my Love & Dom/Sub points before big main story events. This drives up your Story Tracker percentages and almost always ends up with most positive version you can get out of events you have little control of (like the scripted ones).