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If the game isn't launching from Steam, it may be Steam related. Have you tried opening up the EA App manually and signing in and launching from there?
There could be "cross-Service" issues causing it. EA Sims 4 access on a 3rd party Microsoft console may not align with EA Sims 4 access on a computer, through the 3rd party distributor Valve and their program Steam, for example. Only way to get that can-of-worms fixed would be to talk to customer support and search the internet for anyone who may have had the same issue. Assuming EA won't attempt to gut your wallet and state that they won't honor cross-platform purchases. BUT....
On your new machine, when you login to the EA app, does it show your previous purchased content for the Sims 4? Is your account YOUR account and not shared with your Ex? If the items are showing, and your account is your account, then getting support from EA or Valve should be an easier task. You have proof that you purchased the items and should be allowed to use them.
My personal copy of TS4 has "cross-service" DLCs. A couple packs I purchased directly from EA, most I purchased through Steam, and the content shows up when I start playing the game, regardless of me starting it through the EA app or through Steam. EA and Valve obviously want the compatibility. Computer-Gremlins, on the other hand, might be involved and causing issues, which EA and Valve support can only handle.
If only taking care of computer-gremlins was as easy in real life as it is in the Sims 4 by going into build mode and taking away a lot trait....