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The game needs Seasons, it should have never been cut out to make an Expansion. That was on purpose. Same goes for most packs they have released, it was content that should be base but they gave it a "theme" and packed it as DLC. (Side note, I have no issues with big corps trying to make more and more money, I just don't think EA is ethical about it). Did the game got better for me with DLC? A big BIG lot. Even more with CC and mods, but that's a different pug.
For me the secret was knowing when to stop buying. I needed a lot of packs, but not all, so I cherry picked. So yeah, that's my 2 cents - just sharing how I see it.
(Edit - the answer is yes, for me they are a must)
For me, getting DLCs kinda happened when I started playing regularly and felt that I wanted to do a little more with my Sims, like making them famous or going to work with them and make them do chores. And at one point I wanted them to have pets - still think horses should have been included with that one, like they were in Sims 3... and I was a bit disappointed that I couldn't make the little buggers take up a job :)
For game packs none of them are must have besides maybe Strangerville (because it is fun, more affordable than expansion packs, and includes a decent sized world for a gamepack), but its occult packs are overall the most popular game packs and whether or not occult packs are a must have is debatable. Also, Parenthood is only a must have if you want to enjoy family gameplay more, but definitely a must have for people to own both Parenthood and Growing Together instead of it only being one or the other.
For kit packs and stuff packs none of them are a must have, but the most popular stuff pack right now is Crystal Creations.
Get to Work is not a "must have" because it has overall poor reviews on Steam, but it is definitely underrated. I would like to see its ratings go up closer to the 50% range instead of staying in the 40% range. Get to Work for example I think is a better expansion pack than Eco Lifestyle, Horse Ranch, Discover University, For Rent (but it is underrated similar to Get to Work that should have at least mixed reviews instead of mostly negative), and High School Years.
Basegame is definitely better than when it first came out, but even with mods it would be weird playing The Sims 4 without Seasons especially at least partially (but not the only reason why) because you get cold and hot weather outfits but are mostly useless without this pack. Get Together, Cottage Living, Growing Together, and even Life and Death are not as much "must have" as Seasons when it comes to expansion packs, but I personally think that playing only just basegame is meant more towards people who overall prefer build mode/CaS over actual gameplay at least in the long run depending on if that person playing The SIms 4 is new to this game and how many hours that person has spent playing this game. I do not know exactly as to how long I plan on continuing to buy dlc for The Sims 4, but if at any point I decide I am not going to buy anymore dlc it is because of The SIms 4 seeming to have endless dlc combined with the fact that reinstalling the game could take a very long time if for some reason I decide to uninstall The Sims 4 because of how much dlc I have on my game.
To be fair there are plenty of others packs besides those for occults, but besides ghosts (added abilities from Life & Death but are basegame), a few new occults from Discover University (bots and secret society but cannot be randomly generated in CaS), aliens, and mermaids the cheapest occults are from gamepacks.
I disagree about the memory wipe thing, because it is easier to deal with than a divorce if you want an alien to divorce a human sim. Just wipe memory and nobody gets sad moodlets from not being married anymore because of memory being wiped out. Another example to make fun of with alien memory wipe is wiping the memory of the Landgraabs who perhaps deserve to have their memories lost for how they treated Johnny Zest. However, even more disturbing than memory wipe from aliens is the fact that Johnny Zest or his descendants of his could potentially have "incest" with the Landgraabs because of not being recognized in the family tree. Memory wipe Bella or Mortimer Goth as well (but I am assuming that should go to Bella and not Mortimer because she was the one abducted according to cannon of The SIms 2 and 3), because Bella is supposed to be abducted and their children are supposed to be gloomy. With Bella's memory being wiped she will want to move out, because she will not remember Mortimer.