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I let toddlers grab a serving from normal food anyway. That way there is less high chair drama than it used to be. For role play purpose you could let the older sims grab a serving for toddlers (never used this function myself), but this could mean they will place the toddler in the high chair and you'll be at the exact point than now.
In this game toddlers and infants control the parents, which is madness. Madness!!
High Chair Lock by PandaSama mod brings back control to player.
The best thing to do always when needing to get an action completed on a toddler/infant is to reset the adult sim and the toddler/infant sim, then select the toddler/or infant and then call for the action to be completed with the toddler/infant sim. AI will prioritize the requested action on the adult sim. If you still have autonomy on with selected sim, you may have issues because the toddler/infant may start queuing other actions while they wait for the adult. Personally I never have autonomy available to my selected sim but I know some people prefer to leave it on for every sim.
I have autonomy turned on for everyone, except for "selected sim". If autonomy is turned on for every sim including even selected sim that means even the selected sim might do something you do not want that sim to be doing. Such as for example wanting your sim to paint, but does not continue painting because of getting distracted. Only people who want the most chaotic gameplays have autonomy turned on for every single sim. As for autonomy being turned off for every sim it could be useful in some circumstances, but not always and probably should be used only for short periods of time at most. There might be some people who have autonomy turned off all of the time for every sim, but in my personal opinion that requires too much micromanagement due to the fact that the sims do not do anything besides doing what you command them to do which is even harder to do for any household that has 7 or 8 sims, but no pets.
And yes I am aware about the high chair complications that's why I had never used them in the past. But they did work for a while.
I don’t touch infants; I can’t stand them. I don’t know if the high chair works with them.
Unless if you own Growing Together for getting milestones you do not really need the high chair anyway for infants even if you were to spend more time playing with them.
I use mods with autonomy turned off but as @Xeriath does with a modless game, I haven't experienced any problems using the chair with toddlers. On a couple of occasions, though, I have witnessed what you're experiencing, albeit a minor 'what th are you doing?' annoyance because I'd only seen those couple of instances.
The chair isn't necessary for toddlers, of course. (They love taking meals on a comfy chair.) The only reason I use it is for Bienchen's 'healthy high chair' mod for toddlers.
I'd only guess it may be related to some other suggestions here but perhaps you can find a mod which will fix it as @Angela has.