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They won't desire independence if they are within your De Jure, if they are still drifting you can speed up the process or just make sure they won't gain momentum with their Faction in case they form one, an Alliance may be all it's needed.
Nevertheless, I would grant them to dynasty members, even from other houses since it will increase the renown your dynasty gets.
Aside from that, there are no penalties for holding them yourself.
That might've been the case in CK2 ( I don't know, never really played it ), but in CK3 this isn't the case unless said dynasty members are independent rulers.
Probably because they were holding a duchy in said kingdom, not because you hold too many.
That was for duchies. Same as in CK3 from King and emperor 2 duchy titles before an opinion penalty.
But what matters is your situation as a ruler. If you have trouble maintaining relations with so many direct vassals then forming Kingdoms let's you reduce the amount of people you have to please. It's also a double edged sword should that king becomes unhappy with you.
There isnt an opinion penalty or any penalty whatsoever in CK3 from what I can see
Only vassal limit which at 60, you could virtually paint the map with dukes
Its a lot of work to keep all small vassels happy.
Having a hand full of kings is a lot less stressing.
Currently I only hold 3 or 4.
Having multiple kingdom tittles is rather meaningless as emperor. If anything it's risky simply because they are lost on succession with multiple heirs. Emperor can actually destroy all kingdom tittles if you so please and everything will still remain the same under the empire tittles rule.
I wouldn't necessarily call it "meaningless", as each held kingdom title grants you extra prestige each month.
Usually you end up with a much bigger rebelliion a generation later, though. But as long as you don't have child rulers, the troop count is usually enough that factions don't get powerful enough.
You don't really need that extra prestige as emperor. You constantly keep having more prestige then you actually need.