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I have no problem with their scouts passing through exploring. They do not return this sentiment. My explorers are ruthlessly hunted down any time they run into an AI unit regardless of where they are on the map. Similarly, I have no interest in settling directly on an AI's border, especially if the territory in question has no resources. The AI does not share this sentiment. Its goal, in every game I've ever played, is to surround my fledgling nation and box me in so I can't expand or explore. It will literally bypass territories that have resources or a natural wonder to settle a tundra area with nothing in it if that territory is on my border.
After seeing this behavior over and over, first in the Victor dev, again in the Poe beta, and now in the release version, I don't need to wait and see what they'll do. I *know* what they'll do. They are mindlessly aggressive one-trick ponies, and the only way to deal with one near you is get rid of it before it grows so large that getting rid of it becomes an all-consuming task.
Then build outpost before them. I didn't notice this but yeah it's possible, but then exploit it yourself.
I believe you are confusing the different options.
You can make an alliance to avoid this, and then there's an option to re allow it but I don't think you are forced to accept it. Myself I often accept and take profit of it.
For sure with abuse at some point the alliance will be broken. But that's the deal.
I don't know why but I don't have AIs doing that or rarely. That said I don't use any AI with trait "attack on sight".
I finished 5 games (2 of which on Humankind level) and don't have similar experience. AI never tries to surround me, unless we compete for the same territories from the beginning (and that is reasonable in that case). I try to do the same against it if it happens, and last time I tried I've got immediate demand, declined it, got war declaration and city assault and surrendered the same turn. But every game I have up to 5 AI allies. And even that one oppenent who declared the war on me, and even after 2 more wars later which I declared on it myself, became one of my allies later.
Exactly. The longer you let them sit there, the worse of a problem they become.
Agree. Trim the AI back by ransacking outposts until you get enough troops together to get it out of your way.
All I can say to this is you must be playing a different game than I am. I've been playing this game for about 5 months or so, and every start is the same. The AI tries to kill my explorers and box me in. The easiest solution isn't to bother with grievances. The easiest solution is to remove the AI from the board. So that is what I do. I have better things to do than have back and forth border disputes with an aggressive neighbor for the whole rest of the game. And, there wouldn't be such border disputes if the AI hadn't crossed 8-10 empty territories to forward settle my borders. <shrug>