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It is "metagaming".
Do not look for another explaination as she was never intended to be an option within a good playthrough.
and no, they didnt want her for good playtroughs. its that people kept finding loopholes and exploits to get her on a good playtrough, so they just gave in and let people do it.
They shoehorned it in after lots of people thirsting after her outside of lore were bending over backwards to recruit her. So they made it a bit more doable technically but there aren't any in-game reasons for non-evil characters to take that route.
Well. I can give you one, but the vocal crowd here won't like it. Basically, as the story goes - you play a good character, say - a paladin - and he sees that villainess who happens to be pretty and sexy. He hates that he has to kill her and so decides that maybe one time he'll make an exception and KO her. After all, if he kills all other villains - then that girl won't be a threat to the Grove all by herself (hint: if you don't think Minthara's "pretty" - that's okay, there are mods to remedy that thing + after all, it's the matter of MC, not the player, albeit I can understand how one's thoughts always define the actions of the other)
That way Minthara gets away with her life by the virtue of being pretty. In-lore her beauty wouldn't be that much of a stretch because she's a drow and those are supposed to possess incredible physical beauty. It's written in the lore[forgottenrealms.fandom.com] - it's just the modern vibes that prevent creating attractive females in general and which force devs to make even drow an "average" in looks at best. But if you roll with the lore, then Minthara would be a rare sight, literally (because drow on the surface are supposed to be incredibly rare) and figuratively (because as I mentioned, her physical beauty should be a sight to behold). Your MC didn't plan for what happens after, he just let her live - and then the rest was down to the plot.
So yes - I agree - you HAVE to have metagaming knowledge to even know this could possibly work. "KO her and you'll be able to recruit her later". NOTHING in the game cues into this - you have to know it from reading it elsewhere. Although, BTW, "elsewhere" includes the Patch Notes, which many players are reading anyway .... however, you can't go by the info there, you need (for most people who don't know already from reading these forums etc.) that it requires a guide. Because, in fact, if you don't "KO" her "right" you still can't recruit her later. "Temp hostile is key".
But let's assume for argument's sake the in-world explanation is ... I don't know ... your Tav has a hunch. "Maybe there's something different about this one." Now, BTW, what can only clue you into this afterward is the fact that her dead or unconscious body has a camp supply sack in their inventory. Even if you read nothing else, this might already start to make a player wonder about something - as only potential companions would have such a thing. So by a 2nd playthrough you have this knowledge. Still "meta" in a sense, but ...
Let's get to the key question. Does she make sense in a "good" party? Well, IF she had an alignment I kinda think it would be neutral evil. BTW, I think that's typical of Drow. But you might already have an evil companion with you - Astarion also acts pretty evil (see another thread on this very topic). Githyanki default alignment is Lawful Evil, although I'm kinda uncertain on Laez. but she might be another. Also, at least at first, Shadowheart seems ... kinda? ... evil ... Shar IS an evil deity ... but ... as always to say more on this is spoilers.
My point is by the time you are running into Minthara, you've got potentially plenty of "evil" with you already. Why draw the line at her? And so here comes the crux of the question. Why would a good player recruit an evil person who had previously been working for the Absolute? I would argue once again a possible in-universe explanation of an intuitive hunch. "Maybe there's something different about this one."
So ... start talking to her and you'll find out the Absolute was brainwashing her, and forcing her to do many of these things she now regrets. She in fact now wants revenge primarily on Orin, who tadpoled her, the murderhobo b*tch. Now I'm not saying she turns "good" after this. She doesn't. But you understand her past actions by this explanation, and I would argue for how approval functions with her and her general attitude, that comes from the culture she was raised in.
Yes, this is all stuff you can only learn post facto; so perhaps the only in-universe explanation is "I had a hunch about her". The weird thing is - note - both of you have tadpoles. Maybe, although the game never explicitly provides this info in an explicit way as it does when you meet other tadpoled beings - when you first met her, you might have gotten some telepathic insight into how she might be different.
TLDR: she is NOT "cartoon evil" and in fact could make sense in a "good" party. And even, yes, possibly being romanced by a good character - once they know and understand her backstory. As after all, good characters could romance evil Viconia in BG2.
I can only agree there.
You can b) save her because you find her hot and don't want to kill her because of romantic or not-so-romantic feelings. A reason quite often seen in real life history too. There is also a hidden fascination that some people take from villains. You know, several people love (especially: famous) murderers who are in prison, acting like fans of music stars.
There's no actual story reason to leave her alive if you decide to destroy the goblins.
Well, I add to my "intuitive hunch" theory that both of you have tadpoles, and tadpoles normally give you telepathic insight into another person's mind. Granted, there is no explicit dialogue moment in the game where this happens. But it certainly COULD have happened and could be headcanon'd.
I agree your initial conversation options with her "don't go there" - but a tadpole connection could certainly get you to sense she is being brainwashed and mind controlled by the Absolute and being forced to do all this.