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Still, here's what you can do:
1. Go to https://www.nexusmods.com/baldursgate3/mods/categories
2. Click on any category you want, for example you mentioned character customization: https://www.nexusmods.com/baldursgate3/mods/categories/3/
3. In the filter selector sort it by unique downloads (don't sort it by endorsements)
Voila, you get the list of most popular mods in the firs 1-3 rows. "Most popular" doesn't mean "best". And it doesn't mean you'll like them. But you have a place to start. And as always, you'll dive into a wonderful journey of managing mods dependencies and compatibility. Good luck.
The only races I've tried are Aasimar and Half Dragon. I think I picked the wrong Aasimar mod as there's two. But all I can tell you is the one I picked is VERY weird and wonky when it comes to customizing appearance. If you want to go crazy, Fantastical Multiverse adds 50 new races to the game. Seems insane, who can do 50 playthroughs to try them all for their custom Tav, "LOL".
For classes, I tried Harlequin, (WoW) Death Knight (there's another one), Demon Hunter, Magus. Harlequin seemed very bard like but not much better. Death Knight and Demon Hunter are not from official source material, obviously, but are imports from WoW, which I have played. Ehhh, especially Death Knight doesn't work well without Script Extender. At one point, I was managing to get PF2E spells for my Magus - couldn't get them for anybody else mind - now that seems to have been borked by my changing mod load order. So stopped using it.
What I'm now finding I really like are Artificer/Artillerist (that's straight out of "official" 5E source material), Mystic, and the Vanguard, which I'm not sure is "official" but seems to me to be a very improved version of the Eldritch Knight (but it's not a fighter subclass).
You didn't ask about subclasses, but here's what I've tried and liked: Hexblade Warlock, Drakewarden Ranger, the pirate Rogue (tho that appears to be homebrew, but it's the Swashbuckler I wanted to play), Storm Herald barbarian, Graviturgy Wizard. And several of the many new monk subclasses added by the monk rework, like Wuxia/Kensei, Rising/Ascendant Dragon, and Sun Soul/Radiant.
Have not found a bard subclass I like. Tried College of Spirits, like the special abilities it has but you randomly roll for which one you get every day. Nah. Oath of Phoenix paladin is nifty but two key abilities require you to either dive on enemies from above or sacrifice yourself in an explosion leaving you with 1HP. (I guess it's implied by the name, of course.) Find I like Oath of the Golden Order (though that appears to come from Elden Ring). There's additional cleric domains, tried out Order Domain, still prefer the in-game ones of Light and Tempest. Circle of stars and stormchasers for druids were interesting.
Anyhoo, a lot of the custom classes are definitely NOT from "official" 5E sources or even homebrow/alternative 5E sources, like "Jedi," Witcher, or the FF14 based classes, but they're all out there, too.
Just as an aside, I think playing either a shadow ninja monk or a samurai in this game would be better if Oriental weapons other than katanas existed, like shuriken. or nunchaku. (There's a weird paucity of throwing weapons in general, like no darts, slings, or chakrams, etc.) I do have a mod that also adds wazikashi or ninja-tos. (Of course, basically, the katanas are longswords and the ninja-tos shortswords.)
One final warning: barbarian rework not only doesn't work properly without script extender, it crashes the game. A lot. Found that out the hard way. (It adds storm herald but also reworks the other three vanilla options. I dropped that one, just took separate storm herald instead.)
You asked about other kinds of customization. I generally only focus on the gameplay ones, so I really have no idea about the ones that customize appearance, or clothing (like that basket of 800 pieces of clothing, wow, talk about overkill.) Did find one that changes Minthara's face and another that negates the "black veins" appearance change from using the Astral Tadpole. MHO: makes her look a lot more like the drow female at Sharess' Caress, and is more to my taste. Now to get the romance to work ...
Yeah, I also use Party Limit begone. And again, it's been updated to use script extender and I would do it that way if I COULD, but I'm kinda forced to still use the older "legacy" version because I can't. You'll run into some issues with it on the boat to Grymforge or going to the House of Hope. Mod author even points this out in the description. To use it in multiplayer, you also have to literally patch the runtime application itself, and he warns you - properly - to make a backup of the app before this.
"the 10 best mods to get" etc.
Also: can't wait until the official mod tools come out for BG3.
No Alphabets
Baldur's Better Aesthetics
NoRomanceMod
Going to suggest otherwise. It seems the BG3 mod fixer fixes a problem that mod saves created on release, but no longer exists post patch 5. You no longer need it, though it's often now embedded into other mods by mod authors who were tired of reminding folks to download it as a prerequisite, them not bothering, and then complaining.
However -- it now creates problems, because if you have it, it prevents the epilogue from playing properly.
I have the Mac mod manager. It's great, but it can't do everything the Windows mod manager can do, but then I'd expect that. I use it. It does do the critical job of helping you reorder their loading order if you need to and enabling and disabling easily.
As for script extender, I've read about what mods that require it can do, and I wish I could run it. Daughter of Lolth made possible what people can finally do the "legit" way post patch 5. There are also mods that let you spawn items, control companion approval and romance flags, give you new custom hirelings and origins (now you can play as a Minthara Origin character) ... all require script extender. It also "powers" the compatibility framework that lets subclasses and custom spells cohabit together better, too. And again, alas I can't run it.
Which is finally to say, yeah, I'm hoping whatever Larian's planning to do to make modding a little bit more official, workshopped, or accessible (I hope that means "script extender" level access to console commands for all), they do, soon.