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Nope enhanced edition will be literally unplayable to him and there's no way someone this easily frustrated has the patience to set up the old one + mods for a modern PC.
Difficulty
The game isn’t difficult provided you pay attention and prepare. I’m not meaning to be rude, but that’s just how it is. You can right click and examine enemies to get an idea how powerful they are, and you have the option to run away from fights if you’re struggling. For bosses like Auntie Ethel, the level of hassle you go through just to reach the proper battle with her should be an indication that she’s not an opponent you want to rush into fighting. Also you should have run across a book that talks about how powerful Hags are, so if you’re ignoring the books and the info they can give, I’m afraid that’s on you.
Weak Gale
Gale is a wizard. They are squishy. You need to protect them and be careful how you build them until they reach lvl 5-6 and they they start kicking out serious damage and powerful AoE. That’s just how wizards are in D&D. You can offset that a bit by giving him a few levels dip into a class that has better HP per level and armour proficiency.
Romance
The romance options for the npcs are designed to ensure that the player can romance whichever character they wish, regardless of the player characters gender identity. The corollary of this is that the npcs will flirt with your character regardless of your character’s gender identity.
You can still tell them no. And still decide to not romance them. You just have to tell them you’re not interested and don’t progress any romantic dialogue with them.
Even in rl sometimes you have to deal with people hitting on you when you’re not interested. And in those cases yes you might have to feel like a Ahole when turning them down. It happens.
"how am i suppose to know that its too early to fight her"
Yep, please report level 0 accounts, they are just troll spam accounts.