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To go go into more detail what I do is I add back stepping and side stepping. they are both half speed and dont lead to an opportunity attack.
Not really what? What does human balance have to do with what I just said? Zero.
This says everything that needs saying, your definition of "Disengage" is not the same as the rulebook's definition. So you homerule it to make more sense to you/your play group. Which is fine if it works for you, but trying to force your definition onto other people isn't. Hence the pushback.
So far as the rulebook and common knowlege are concerned, disengagement is an action that allows you to move out of melee weapon reach of one or more enemies with your guard up. This is similar to the "Dodge" action (not appearing in BG3) that is the newer form of a full-defense action, except you also retain your movement. This lets you withdraw from one engagement in a combat, not nessasarily combat as a whole.
Almost like its a fantasy game, where the stakes are exaggerated. And isnt just one on one where you can duel and get out of range
do you also fight on a turn-based system?
Except people with fencing/dueling experience have also weighed in and called you out, including myself now. Might be a surprise, but D&D is not 100% analogous to RL duels, in significant part because in a duel you're not waiting for "Your turn" and letting the opponent do whatever. You're constantly testing, feinting, gauging reaction times, trying to set them into a rhythm to disrupt.
The closest analogue to doing all of that are reaction actions like Attacks of Opportunity, where if you're not specifically guarding yourself as you withdraw from an engagement you're going to get a stab to the side or a lash across the back from a sudden lunge or slash to your unguarded side. And again, if you are guarding yourself properly, that's what's defined as a disengagement by the rulebook.
This reminds me of the kind of weird arguments people come up with as to why firearms often don't exist in their fantasy games. "Guns are too powerful!" or "A single shot should kill!" and yet they never apply the same thinking to swords, bows, and being struck by a meteor conjured by magic. lol.
There is absolute logic to it: you can move backwards, side to side, around, were you like - so long as you don't move outside the weapon range of your opponent, aka running away. If you just run away you will get swiped for free.
If you want to disengage from an enemy you must spend an action to do it (unless you are a rogue in which case you can use a bonus action). The action consumed represents what you have to do to avoid becoming defenceless while you attempt to disengage from your melee attacker.
Remember this works both ways. Your mage can't just walk away from a brute of an ogre and then zap it between the eyes with whatever - but then neither can an enemy mage do that to you.
I for one am very happy that I can get in an enemy mage's faces and they have to spend their action on trying to disengage rather than cast Hold Person or w/e on me in a vain attempt to preserve their miserable existences. Especially as they usually can't move far enough away to stop me reaching them to whack the bejesus out of them next turn and finish the blighters off for good.
LMAO. Yeah, your imaginary sword fights are the real deal. Everyone should listen and learn from you. What a guy loool i can't