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Act 3, you learn that Astarion was compelled by his master to take children that belonged to the Gur people (you may have encountered 1 in act 1). Secretly under the mansion of the vampire lord, Cazador took the children and made them all vampires and kept them imprisoned as they wait to be sacrificed by Cazador for his vampire ascension ritual. Astarion didnt realize they'd been turned and depending on how you play him to that point he either is somewhat disgusted it happened or doesnt care(ie semi-good vs evil astarion to that point per your choices).
If your party kills cazador and you help Astarion ascend, obviously all those child vampires die.
If your party kills cazador and you dont help astarion to ascend, then the children are set free but you can later encounter some down in the sewers under the city with their parents trying to figure out what to do. The parents decide to take the children far down into the underdark to keep them away from others they may harm due to their nature now.
So either its a tragedy one way or a tragedy another way.
Here. Have a look at what gains his approval. He is a piece of garbage.
https://baldursgate3.wiki.fextralife.com/Astarion
That's an evil play through choice by the player, so that feeds into that and working as intended. Astarion is rather pan-alignment shifting depending on what you opt (or dont opt) to do.
I disagree that the killing them is the good choice. Its a choice but the parents if you dont seem to prefer to kill them and thank you for reuniting them even if it means that they have to move deep into the under dark. But if you dont let astarion ascend but kill the children its iffy.
Interestingly enough when I encountered the children with their parents in the sewers after rescuing them, I accidently had lythander equiped and when the children started taking damage, the parent also aggro'd from it hehe.
I think they tried to make him appealing to both good and evil players and hence he comes across as a confused mess. If he only approved of evil stuff, he'd be a second Minthara (as in evil path exclusive, not that she only approves of evil stuff, idk that), yet at the same time he has to approve of that stuff so he's viable for evil playthroughs. That is how I read it anyway. Not saying it's good.
Another thing I think is weird is that if you play as these characters, you can make them act completely differently. I admit I sometimes control Astarion to stop him being annoying. xD
Astarion is a piece of garbage. If he wasn't presented as a twink no one would be on his side.
Again, your choices play a factor into which end of the spectrum his alignment shifts.
As for approving kindness to animals but feeding on them. Its really not any different than the spectrum of things with us non vampires and our dinner choices. Again all depends on your play choices(you can even have him kick that squirrel if memory serves.
Minthara is also someone interesting because they too do not necessarily have to be wholly evil(you can even do a playthrough where you dont lose karlach and wyll and keep her and have some minor redemption with her.
People think too for example(if we talk in terms of gods) that Bhaal would be considered chaotic evil(especially if you look at Orin) but he's actually in lore Neutral Evil.
Again Astarion and many of the characters are pan-alignment based and can be as vile or as redemptive as you choose.
Your churlishness aside, Im addressing your inadequate understanding of the game allowing various character's alignments to have a spectrum of shifting vs being a 2 dimensional evil vs good only sort of dichotomy. And I could care less about his pan sexuality(as he, like many characters are pansexual also by design in the game to facilitate one's choose your own adventure choices).
All in all you're being a bit silly.
And I'm saying your waving a wet blanket by not looking at the details. Regardless of this mechanic astarion always disapproves of you doing the heroic or altruistic deed and regularly chastises you for it. He also approves of you taking advantage of people and doing objectively evil things regardless of your player choices.
As an example Shadowheart also likes it when you lie to people but she enjoys you being cunning and still dislikes it when you lie to people to be evil or to be petty.
Like I said before being happy about children dying is a bit of deal breaker.
Sounds pretty unheroic if what your guy cares about is getting something in return.
I hate to break it to you but your guy is no hero.