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Do you mean I should open the game start a multiplayer game, then tab out of the game , then invite her from the steam tab instead of the ingame tab?
She gets the invite messages on her chat box but when she clicks it it just loads up the game and brings her to the main menu not to the multiplayer lobby. And we tried her inviting me etc still the same issue.
I just got the game to play multiplayer. We both loaded the game, I made a multiplayer game invite only/password both work, then I invite from the lobby screen after setting up my character. Did it twice that way with no problem. So maybe, both of you be on the menu, then you create the game and invite.
but nothing works not on steam and ingame