CHHH "GATE GUARD to front end, you got a copy?!" *wakie crackle* We joked at the mans back, to no end. the day Daniel showed up, or that night he ran out at shift change with an alarm blaring for the past whatever, and you made him go back and turn it off, his weird ass self. Or the time he said during the blm protest, he was in a target bathroom with a gun as they looted. Every moment with Robert. I thought we never would speak again after you moved from my site, but it was hell. To the night we stood on top the billion dollar building smoking a blunt, pondering the futility of life. To the night we played golf inside the financial offices with the guys clubs. To the night you showed me the site and walked by that elevator the moment we spoke of the dead. The day I came back and got put at Isaacs site with you, kathy, and paul and good ol' al. I would give it all to do it again. To the nights we rushed through that underground hellish landscape scribbling down the dials and screen data to get the hell out. The nights we flipped that device like a knife. The nights of loneliness, isolation, and fear. To the you laughed and said your degree was pointless, and would be in debt for ever. I thought you joked. To the nights we lied to Isaac's calling family about his location, or his job routine, I think he totally cheated. Kathy's self would be so governmental about it. You know she was a one star generals secretary in the Vietnam war, such a sweetheart. To the night we heard about the Chicago gun trains, and the conversations that followed. To that night Kathy had to lose the last Christmas with her kid for Isaac, and it was his last too.To the nights we talked about ai, and your inability to see one day they will surpass us. To the night you admitted you were a masonic godfather. To the nights I played "Chuck Mangione, Feels so good" on the walkie obsessively loud and incomprehensible to anyone outside the loop. To the night we watched that big black ♥♥♥♥♥ torch the company car. To the nights we chatted of the ancients, our posterity, or the slow collapse of the western social contract and our inability to act on it. To the nights you wooed me from jumping into the void, by bringing the words of old philosophy and ideas to me. You're vocabulary is still the most peculiar and amazingly educated things I've heard. It's like talking to an ai. To the nights we debated music, tradition, values, and meaning. To the nights you drank on the job, and I covered. To the nights we ate that garbage food. To the nights you slept on the job, and I pleaded with Isaac to let it go. To the night you left, and the day after he followed you. To the night I joked, not to off yourself over this one job. To the days you didn't respond, and I googled your name to find a celebration of life. It was huge man, like a thousand. It was casual just your style, I wore my best suit for you. and cried non stop man. You were supposed to be my kids godfather. I know I was one of the last to hear from you, and I could have done something. I can't believe that I didn't reach out after your decline, you've done more for me and, I'm sorry. To know the most intelligent, academically talented, and profound intellectual man I have ever witnessed, couldn't find a reason. Such is the futility of life. The site broke down, I left, Kathy met her a decent guy, moved up, alone, with some retired grunt.Stacey took lead, Isaac got a promotion. Anthony got kidney failure and left. Rock on Josiah, it was an honor.

Your problems are going to work out, don't get wacky and rash. "Take it one thing at a time, even if that one thing is the day, take it one minute at a time." Kathy