Recent reviews by Limpinator

Best CCG I've ever played and it's a damn shame what happened to it.

Who knows, maybe 1 day we might be able to see a triumphant return but until that day I guess I'll stick to just playing against bots every now and then when I'm bored.

I love democracy

This is honestly the best rogue-like I've ever played.

The combat is outstanding and even more so with this new update that adds 2 new weapons for each character and 3 passives for each weapon.

Spells feel awesome and flashy.

Auras, gambits, echos, and more allow you to really custom tailor your build to something awesome.

I'm not even a fan of Zodiac's and I think the story is actually really interesting with learning new bits of lore each run.

And to add on top of all of that? It's ♥♥♥♥♥♥ co-op.

I honestly could go on but just buy it and support some devs who actually give a damn.

I got all the achievements and I still can't stop playing.

I think I have a problem.

When did people start playing Souls-like games with Mouse+Keyboard?

What's next, are people 5 years from now going to start complaining that the game runs poorly with a guitar hero controller?

Game is amazing for souls fans and Rot3K fans alike.

Fatshark lied.

1. Classes work the EXACT same then they did in Vermintide 2 offering nothing new to the table.
2. There is no story what so ever with cut-scenes just being people tell you how much you suck. Dan Abnett was just bait.
3. We are missing weapons that were not only shown in videos but are in the damn COVER ART.
4. There are no meaningful side objectives in levels. You wanna know what the side objectives are? Collecting grims/tomes.
5. Crafting is not even in the game while we have a fully functional in game cash shop.
6. There is NO way to earn the in game currency by playing the game when they said it was going to be a thing.
7. The HUB world has no social aspect about it whatsoever and is a shell of what Vermintide offered.
8. No weapon modification or attachment mechanic.
9. Missing bosses/enemies that were shown in promotional videos.
10. There are no level modifiers that even work. The only ones they have are more/less horde. Amazing.
11. Character backstory does nothing and is not even referenced once either in story or in game.
12. Character banter was downgraded and provides nothing for the player. Vermintide 2 is superior in every aspect.
13. Bugs that existed in Vermintide 2 release are in the game currently! Why?!
14. This game is not a full release.

These are just all the things Fatshark has LIED about. If I wanted, I could then get into the actual issues of the game. Things like the terrible player progression/economy where the only way to get new guns is to log on every hour for weapons you never want.

Or how about the horrific optimization and disconnection issues where you'll be lucky to be playing with 30 fps even on the most tricked out rigs

And then there is the asinine weekly grinding mechanic that is only in the game to drain time out of your day with pointless currency that is also tied to a shop but this time it refreshes every 8 hours...Wow.

This was the one game I was hyped for all year and Fatshark blew it. And not only they they blow it, but they have the audacity to call this a full, successful launch and they should be ashamed.

Save your money, give it a year and MAYBE the game will be worth. But until then stay far away.

This game reminds me of a simple time back when I was just a kid with an Xbox 360. No loot boxes, no agendas, no drama. Just plan, simple, fun. That is what gaming is all about and at the time it was only a dollar to play. A steal then and a steal now.

Playing this game made me feel like that kid and even though it was only for a moment I'm always gonna cherish it.

So after trying to get the game working for HOURS I finally got in and spawned in on a PvP island because that's kinda how you should play the game I feel...

Well, upon spawning into the island I get attacked by 2 naked dudes wielding swords 10 seconds into loading into the damn starting tower. But, no worry! There are guards surrounding us, I'm sure they will help me!

NO!

THEY DID ♥♥♥♥♥♥ NOTHING!

So my noob ass had to watch my character "attempt" to hit these naked people in what I assume was the combat of this game?... To be honest I don't even think my character hit any of them once. Not to mention, this was probably the worst fight I ever had to witness as it comprissed of 10 minutes of running in circles hitting the air around my two attackers while they where still managing to chip at my health... At least, I THINK my character was attempting to hit them! I herd a lot of waking sounds but no animations from any of the 3 of us so something was clearly happening!

Oh, and the best part. Once I lost everything I respawned again and they continued to kick my now naked ass 3 more times over.

And here's the thing. I'm all down for open world PvP. But something is CLEARLY wrong when you have a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ spawn tower with GUARDS that don't do ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥! On top of that, the damn tutorial dosen't even teach you how to fight! They even say and I ♥♥♥♥♥♥ quote,

“For your safety, we won’t show you this part in this tutorial, but always be careful of dangerous creatures in the world...”

I’m sorry...

WHAAAATTTT?!

You mean to tell me, that in a game where you can get killed within the first few SECONDS of spawning you think it’s a good idea to NOT teach me how to defend my self?! Apparently, upon doing further research on writing this review there is a slight chance I was not at all hitting my target because I did not have auto attack on...

DON’T YOU THINK THATS SOMETHING WE SHOULD KNOW?!

WHY DO YOU NOT TELL US THIS IN A GAME WHERE YOU CAN LOSE EVERYTHING UPON DEATH!


So, in conclusion this game has already spat in my face but I will continue to see if it gets better. Why anyone would want to waste their precious time playing this slog of a game is beyond my understanding but if anything changes I will for sure update this review.

But don't hold your breath.

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I'm sorry how do you make a tutorial and state that you won't show part of the tutorial in THE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ TUTORIAL?! Especially when that part is the mother ♥♥♥♥♥♥ COMBAT! You know! The ONLY thing keeping you from dying!

That'd be like making a step by step guide on how to build a house and say

"For your saftey we won't show you how to build the roof of your new home but we hope you take care in your construction and be careful when climbing ladders."

GOOD LUCK PROTECTING YOUR HOUSE FROM THE ♥♥♥♥♥♥ ELEMENTS ASS HAT!


Oh, and also. Apparently the fan boys of this game think this is good game design...

HA!

Game is really fun! And there are a solid amount of different characters all with their own skills/passives. And surprisingly the game offers no pay to win ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.

The only negatives I can think of is it takes a while to play a game due to the player base and sometimes you get random FPS drops.

But other then that the game is pretty damn solid! Here's hoping time will make the game only better.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.

It got me. It really did.

Do yourself a favor and play this game. It's free, and it won't take more then 2 hours I promise.


Then afterwards you can contemplate the meaning of life.