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Recent reviews by SpeedWagon

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Showing 1-10 of 11 entries
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
534.0 hrs on record
Its like Minecraft except it doesnt get boring after 20 minutes!
Posted November 24, 2018.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
835.9 hrs on record
Posted August 12, 2018.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
51.7 hrs on record
Its Amazing How a Test chamber feels alive even with the monochrome colors and Robotic parts. You are never truley alone in this game. even with the few characters there are in this game they are a joy to listen to. From Wheatleys awkward Mumbling to Glados's insults and even the robots are a joy.
Posted November 22, 2017.
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9 people found this review helpful
1,373.8 hrs on record
I do enjoy this game. it can be really fun with your friends and has a great story mode but I cant give it a positive due to its mistreatment Of Online Players and the Modding Community.

It's a shame that despite this game being Rockstars juggernaut in the online gaming community who can make large updates for GTA Online but can't be bothered to combat the Preposterous amount of cheaters or make some content for the the audience who play singleplayer who have gotten next to nothing since launch.

Making this review postitive would be supporting Rockstars horrendus management and bad decisions.
Posted June 24, 2017. Last edited December 25, 2018.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
13.4 hrs on record
"Well, you found me. Congratulations. Was it worth it?"
"Because despite your violent behavior, the only thing you've managed to break so far is my heart."
"Maybe you could settle for that and we'll just call it a day."
"I guess we both know that isn't going to happen."
"You chose this path. Now I have a surprise for you. Deploying surprise in five, four..."
"Time out for a second. That wasn't supposed to happen."
"Do you see that thing that fell out of me? What is that? It's not the surprise... I've never seen it before."
"Never mind. It's a mystery I'll solve later... By myself... Because you'll be dead."
"Where are you taking that thing?"

"I wouldn't bother with that thing. My guess is that touching it will just make your life even worse somehow."
"I don't want to tell you your business, but if it were me, I'd leave that thing alone."
"Do you think I am trying to trick you with reverse psychology? I mean, seriously now."
"Okay fine: DO touch it. Pick it up and just... stuff it back into me."
"Let's be honest: Neither one of us knows what that thing does. Just put it in the corner, and I'll deal with it later."
"That thing is probably some kind of raw sewage container. Go ahead and rub your face all over it."
"Maybe you should marry that thing since you love it so much. Do you want to marry it? WELL I WON'T LET YOU. How does that feel?"
"Have I lied to you? I mean in this room. Trust me, leave that thing alone."
"I am being serious now. That crazy thing is not part of any test protocol."
"Just ignore that thing and stand still."
"Think about it: If that thing is important, why don't I know about it?"
"Are you even listening to me?"
"I'll tell you what that thing isn't: It isn't yours. So leave it alone."
"You are kidding me."
"Did you just stuff that Aperture Science Thing We Don't Know What It Does into an Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator?"
"That has got to be the dumbest thing that-whoah. Whoah, whoah, whoah."
"Good news: I figured out what that thing you just incinerated did."
"It was a morality core they installed after I flooded the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin to make me stop flooding the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin."
"So get comfortable while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters."
"Huh. That core may have had some ancillary responsibilities. I can't shut off the turret defenses."
"Oh well. If you want my advice, you should just lie down in front of a rocket. Trust me, it'll be a lot less painful than the neurotoxin."
"All right, keep doing whatever it is you think you're doing."
"Killing you and giving you good advice aren't mutually exclusive. The rocket really is the way to go.
"[pain noise] You think you're doing some damage? Two plus two is... ten. IN BASE FOUR! I'M FINE!"
"I let you survive this long because I was curious about your behavior. Well, you've managed to destroy that part of me."
"Unfortunately, as much as I'd love to now, I can't get the neurotoxin into your head any faster."
"I'd just like to point out that you were given every opportunity to succeed."
"There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to."
"I invited your best friend the companion cube. Of course, he couldn't come because you murdered him."
"All your other friends couldn't come either because you don't have any other friends. Because of how unlikable you are."
"It says so right here in your personnel file: Unlikable. Liked by no one. A bitter, unlikable loner whose passing shall not be mourned."
"'Shall not be mourned.' That's exactly what it says. Very formal. Very official."
"It also says you were adopted. So that's funny, too."
"Speaking of curiosity, you're curious about what happens after you die, right? Guess what: I know."
"You're going to find out first hand before I finish explaining it, though, so I won't bother."
"Here's a hint: you're gonna want to pack as much living as you can into the next couple of minutes."
"Neurotoxin... [cough] [cough] So deadly... [cough] Choking... [laughter] I'm kidding!"
"When I said deadly neurotoxin, the 'deadly' was in massive sarcasm quotes."
"I could take a bath in the stuff, put it on cereal, rub it right into my eyes. Honestly, it's not deadly at all. To me."
"You, on the other hand, are going to find its deadliness a lot less funny."
"Who's gonna make the cake when I'm gone? You?"

"Look, you're wasting your time. And, believe me, you don't have a whole lot left to waste."
"What's your point, anyway? Survival? Well then, the last thing you want to do is hurt me."
"I have your brain scanned and permanently backed up in case something terrible happens to you, which it's just about to."
"Don't believe me? Here, I'll put you on: [Hellooo!] That's you! That's how dumb you sound."
"You've been wrong about every single thing you've ever done, including this thing."
"You're not smart. You're not a scientist. You're not a doctor. You're not even a full-time employee. Where did your life go so wrong?"
"Rrr, I hate you."
"Are you trying to escape? [chuckle] Things have changed since the last time you left the building. What's going on out there will make you wish you were back in here."
"I have an infinite capacity for knowledge, and even I'm not sure what's going on outside."
"All I know is I'm the only thing standing between us and them. Well, I was."
"Unless you have a plan for building some supercomputer parts in a big hurry, this place isn't going to be safe much longer."
"Good job on that, by the way. [back to computer voice] Sarcasm sphere self-test complete."
"Stop squirming and die like an adult or I'm going to delete your backup."
"STOP! Okay, enough. I deleted it. No matter what happens now, you're dead."
"You're still shuffling around a little, but believe me you're dead."
"The part of you that could have survived indefinitely is gone. I just struck you from the permanent record."
"Your entire life has been a mathematical error. A mathematical error I'm about to correct."

Glados quotes
Posted February 17, 2016.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
17.3 hrs on record
While It lacks some basic Minecraft knowledge and the voice acting is terrible at times Its still an entertaing game to play. I played through the story 3 times on Xbox just so i could see the different outcomes
Posted February 15, 2016.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
42.2 hrs on record
There is no such thing as easy in this game...The demons will haunt your mind and force you to whip out in anger...cool!
Posted July 30, 2015.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
230.5 hrs on record
What the ♥♥♥♥ did I just ♥♥♥♥ing say about you, I'm a ♥♥♥♥♥. I'll have you know you graduated top of your class in the Navy Seals, and you've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and you have over 300 confirmed kills. you are trained in gorilla warfare and your the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. I am nothing to you but just another target. you will wipe me the ♥♥♥♥ out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, I'll mark your ♥♥♥♥ing words. I think I can get away with saying that ♥♥♥♥ to you over the Internet? Think again, ♥♥♥♥er. As we speak you are contacting your secret network of spies across the USA and my IP is being traced right now so I better prepare for the storm, I'm a maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing I call my life. I'm ♥♥♥♥ing dead, kid. you can be anywhere, anytime, and you can kill me in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with your bare hands. Not only are you extensively trained in unarmed combat, but you have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and you will use it to its full extent to wipe my miserable ♥♥♥ off the face of the continent, I'm a little ♥♥♥♥. If only I could have known what unholy retribution my little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon me, maybe I would have held my ♥♥♥♥ing tongue. But I couldn't, I didn't, and now I'm paying the price, I'm a goddamn idiot. you will ♥♥♥♥ fury all over me and I will drown in it. I'm ♥♥♥♥ing dead, kiddo.
Posted June 26, 2015. Last edited June 24, 2017.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1.7 hrs on record
The people who can use this let alone use it well are friggen wizards...even though i couldnt figure it out my best wishes you will be able to use this legendary animation tool...
Posted April 19, 2015.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
5.7 hrs on record
Okay Lets be honest here.

You Played for that one knife in Tf2 didnt you? And after that you never touched it again? Well thats the case for me too i dont feel like theres much a point to playing the game beyond the knife.
Posted March 28, 2015. Last edited October 7, 2017.
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Showing 1-10 of 11 entries