31 people found this review helpful
9 people found this review funny
Not Recommended
0.0 hrs last two weeks / 0.3 hrs on record (0.2 hrs at review time)
Posted: Feb 11, 2020 @ 5:27pm

At a Glance
(Adult) Content
No. Skintight clothes.
Not applicable.
Hours of Gameplay
Half-an-hour. . . if that.
Modding Support?
Patch Required?

GIRLS BATTLEGROUNDS | 性感大逃杀 is a bad third-person shooter, loosely based on battle royal games.

You play as an attractive girl, armed with a frying pan, a pistol, a machine gun, and a sniper rifle. Each weapon fulfills a niche purpose, but I think that the sniper rifle is objectively the best gun. The only reason you'd use the machine gun is if you suck at aiming, and the pistol if (again) you suck at aiming (at close-quarters). The frying pan just sucks altogether. Forget you have a frying a pan.

You're better-off equipping nothing than the frying pan.

Now, this is a third-person shooter game. This makes it easy to stare-down your (female) avatar, which comes in handy. You play on an enclosed stage with many other ladies, all armed with a random gun. The sniper-ladies are deadliest of the bunch. They respawn infinitely, and until they see you, they will run in circles at the center of the map. You can fearlessly pick them off with your sniper rifle, until they spawn behind you.

Beyond that, there isn't much else to say. If you die, you respawn (often with another enemy). You don't progress, and there isn't even a score to motivate you to do better. This game is horribly optimized. You can't set FPS limits either, which means it will draw maximum-power from your PC. For those of you with Alienware laptops (like me!), expect your pretty thighs to be burned!

No story. You're a girl that's been plunged into gladiatorial combat (with guns!) You're a clone, and every time you die, you're replaced with another you. By the way, I made that "story" up.

I have a feeling that there is quite a bit of "asset-flipping" occurring in this title. That aside, the ladies look fine, but unvaried. There's one lady to be (and shoot-at), think of everyone (including yourself) as clones. The (one) stage looks dark and gloomy, and looks good-enough. The in-game visuals work, but I wasn't impressed by anything. The user-interface is bold and usable, but doesn't seem polished.

No, this game is not worth you hard-earned money. I doubt it'll keep you interested for more than fifteen, twenty minutes and there is no sense of progression. If anything, this game is like a form of gaming purgatory.

You shoot-shoot (the same targets) and die-die (in the same place), and that is all you do.

Support the Wombat
If you enjoy my review(s), please follow my Curator page. I live and die on your thumbs (up) and follows.

Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award