Below is a transcript of a call between an HSH employee and a client for your training purposes. As per office policy, any employee attempting to share call transcripts with outside authorities will be forcibly defenestrated.

AGENT: Thank you for callin~

CLIENT: Listen salt licker. I ain't got time for your bibble babble. I got somethin in my computer! I don't even know how to begin describin it!

AGENT: Can you describe it?

CLIENT: I JUST SAID I CAN'T DESCRIBE IT YOU FUME HUFFIN SHUFFLE STEPPER!!!

AGENT: Okay okay. Let's start with some basics. Is it long?

CLIENT: Hell no! It's shorter than a blind date setup by a well meanin coworker.

AGENT: That helps. Does it seem violent?

CLIENT: Sparky, I have two fingers left on my wipin hand. I lost 1 in a hilarious shop class prank, worth it by the way, 1 to a Canadian goose who are NOT AT ALL LIKE MY PICTURE BOOKS SAY, and 1 just now to this snappy gremlin. You ever try wipin with just 2 fingers? I'm suddenly on a 3rd date basis with myself!

AGENT: Got it. Okay. Anything else you can tell me about it?

CLIENT: It's jackin around with my text to speech app! Rambling some nonsense about wood elves I never heard. Only wood elf I like comes on them cookies boxes. I'd lick up that chocolaty center any day, and I DO mean that se~

AGENT: Thank you, that's quite enough. So you'd say it's Short, Snappy, and Creative?

CLIENT: Bingo bango chaff chewer!

AGENT: It sounds like you're dealing with the game we're reviewing right now. Don't worry. You just need to play through it one time. It won't have any real surprises for you after that, and it should be pretty easy to put down afterwards.

CLIENT: What in the purple pastures is a game review!? Are you tellin me I need to PLAY with this finger clinger???

AGENT: Well, if you'd rather not, there's a few other options available. Lobotomy Corp has a similar cryptid discovery appeal and will likely hold your attention longer, but lacks HSH's presentation. Killer Frequency is a more robust version of this game's "horror IT" angle, but is priced higher. Finally, as a bit of a curve ball Hypnospace Outlaw indulges in the fun data discovery gameplay of HSH, but is more 90s groovy than 90s spooky.

CLIENT: I didn't understand a word of what you said just now crop duster, and I'm fixin to black out soon from some mix of blood loss and septic shock.

AGENT: Thank you for calling HSH. Have a nice day!

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