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Help us translate Steam

You don't really want it, but your dad gives you it anyway
And I'm thinking to myself, "She's PROBABLY got AIDS." So I go and get myself tested and, lo-and-behold, I'm positive.
This gets me thinking, "Where the ♥♥♥♥ does an eight year old get AIDS?!"
"Who has my sister been hanging out with?!"
So I replied, "No, your generation is too reliant on technology!"
Then I disconnected his life support.
"Why do you ask?", says the Dad.
The boy says, "Well a guy at school has a bike for sale for $150 and I can't decide if I want to haggle him down to $100 or just steal it."
The civilian Army employee says, "Are you an idiot? Didn't you hear a jet slammed into the side of the Pentagon?"
"I just wanted a beer to drown the numbness after working all day in hell, not put up with this ****," said the firefighter, "Let's go somewhere else."
The rabbi throws up his hands. "Oi! Why does this happen to me every time I want to go get a drink?"
10. There are now 18 fewer Arab taxi drivers terrorizing the streets.
9. Flight training schools proved that they are expensive but worth it.
8. People are learning how to spell "Afghanistan" correctly.
7. Plenty of parking available at airports now.
6. Jerry Springer Show was off the air for a whole week.
5. Sales for U.S. flags are way up.
4. Several new job openings now at NYPD and NYFD.
3. Much lower electric bills for Manhattan.
2. Home videos of the WTC attack more spectacular than Arnold Schwarzenegger's last
5 movies.
And the number one ...
1. Some great new unobstructed views of Manhattan now.
4
If one side of the Pentagon has collapsed, will it now be renamed "The Square"?
It should be renamed "The Penta-gone"
It should be renamed "Manflatten"
Famous last words: "Amal, was this tower here yesterday?"
Hoping you had a Merry Christmas!!
2:57 PM - Ƥαƿ∂§ღµ☈ƒ: I'd rather kill you and use your blood as thermal paste.
𝒮𝒶𝓃𝓉𝒶𝒮𝓂𝓊𝓇𝒻: ?
Rawrn, the Silent Bald Man: You ARE a problem
𝒮𝒶𝓃𝓉𝒶𝒮𝓂𝓊𝓇𝒻: .k Dom
Rawrn, the Silent Bald Man was kicked by Ғeiris Nyannyan.
Rawrn, the Silent Bald Man entered chat.
Ѕkuthix10: I really want to play Undetale, but all that's left is a genocide run and I already hate myself enough so I don't want to do a Genocide run. what do
[FCC] Perk™, The Little Perk: hmm...
Rawrn, the Silent Bald Man: That was rude of me
Shawn in a nutshell
10:19 PM - Ƥαƿ∂§ღµ☈ƒ: .k DOm
10:19 PM - Ƥαƿ∂§ღµ☈ƒ: Oh ♥♥♥♥ it
10:19 PM - Rawrn, Lord of the Flies was kicked by Ƥαƿ∂§ღµ☈ƒ.
You magnificent bastard
hentai cameltoe when?
wat
6:47 PM - ℒḯαм: Shawn - ♥♥♥♥♥ Destroyer Extrodinare
6:49 PM - Rawrn, Lord of the Flies: "I want your smurf"
6:50 PM - Majian: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
6:50 PM - Rawrn, Lord of the Flies: shawn and his gf
6:50 PM - Rawrn, Lord of the Flies: roleplaying
6:50 PM - Majian: ye
6:50 PM - Rawrn, Lord of the Flies: She's gargamel
6:50 PM - Rawrn, Lord of the Flies: "I want to eat your smurf"
6:50 PM - FCC-M ♥3ᗪ ᗪᖇᙓᗩᗰ♥: >.>
6:50 PM - Majian: XD
6:51 PM - Ƥαƿ∂§ღµ☈ƒ: You guys have serious issues...
(sorry not trying to be creepy I'm not creepy like other people on internet I respect women)