1 person found this review helpful
7 people found this review funny
0.0 hrs last two weeks / 3.8 hrs on record
Posted: Jul 2 @ 7:19am

Early Access Review
So, this is going to be a story about a time where I almost ♥♥♥♥ myself in this game.

So, a mate that I haven't played with for about two years randomly messaged me. He asked me if I had the game, "Don't Starve Together". (I know this isn't this game, but calm your ♥♥♥♥!) I responded with a hard fat "NO", I forgot I had Caps-Lock enabled. Mind this, it was 4 in the morning, and I had just woken up. He told me that he had bought a 2 for 1 deal for the game back in 2016, and all the people on his friends list had the game, but didn't want to play it with him.

He offered to gift me the game because I didn't have the game, so I said, "If you want to, you could do that! I would be pretty grateful!". He had gifted me the game and told me to download it while he was at work, so I did. When he came back, it was 4 PM and I was playing the game to learn the basics. He messaged me that he had gotten home and was ready to play if I was. So we started playing together. We played the game for about 2 - 3 hours and we got a bit bored. He told me about this game called "Project Zomboid", and told me that it was worth the price. I was willing to purchase it and play it with him. So, I purchased it and downloaded it. I was browsing Reddit, and was looking at memes, when my download sparked from 10 minutes left to about four hours. I was so confused and so was he, because I was home alone and nobody could be on the Wi-Fi.

Ok, back to the story. So it eventually downloaded and I launched the game. I immediately realised, that when I spawned in, my game had severe stutters and it kept on freezing. I changed some settings and it stopped. So, we took cover inside of a house, and we had went to raid a few houses. I went a bit to far from the house and got lost, and just before that, I had a Bacon and Cheese burger. My indigestion system had acted up a bit, and I had to ♥♥♥♥. I was running between houses and was running away from about 30 zombies and I couldn't hold it in. My mate was laughing at me while I was screaming, and almost crying. I was scared to die but I had to go, like right then.

So, I threw my headphones down onto my desk and I ran to the toilet. When I got back, it was no surprise that I had died. My friend was dying of laughter, and I was ♥♥♥♥♥♥.

The moral of the story is that you should not have a Bacon and Cheese burger before you play this game.
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Akarxo Jul 6 @ 10:53am 
every time thursdoid sent me to a place i go x)
Lime Green Jul 4 @ 5:56pm 
They mentioned this on the latest Thursdoid: https://projectzomboid.com/blog/2019/07/more-maths/