Sexy, just a lil tho

WARNING! Carry on reading! Or you will die, even if you only looked at the word warning! Once there was a little girl called Clarissa, she was ten-years-old and she lived in a mental hospital, because she killed her mom and her dad. She got so bad she went to kill all the staff in the hospital so the More- government decided that best idea was to get rid of her so they set up a special room to kill her, as humane as possible but it went wrong the machine they were using went wrong. And she sat there in agony for hours until she died. Now every week on the day of her death she returns to the person that reads this letter, on a monday night at 12:00a.m. She creeps into your room and kills you slowly, by cutting you and watching you bleed to death. Now send this to ten other profiles on this one site, and she will haunt someone else who doesn't. This isn't fake. apparently, if u copy and paste this to ten comments in the next ten minutes u will have the best of your life

im pregnant, and its yours. call me STRAIGHT away

I honestly don't remember posting that

i'm objectively pretty attractive. 6'1'', fit, facial aesthetics, and have a large number of friends. BUT, my little dicklet is laughable. 5 inches long, and a mere 4 inches of girth. to be honest, it hasn't seemed to matter that much with girlfriends. i am enthusiastic in the sack, can muster serious stamina, and know my way around a ♥♥♥♥.
YET there is nothing more i love doing than going to some barslut or tinder ♥♥♥♥♥'s place and revealing my pathetic pissclit. i'm sure they expected the whole package with me, so the look of defeat is palpable. it is an amazing sort of bathos that plunges them into a chasm that only a mind addled by hunger for BIGCOCK can appreciate.
i then ♥♥♥♥ them poorly for a hasty 5 minutes, achieve my climax, and make my leave, knowing i've done right in this world.

Get memed