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29 of 29 (100%) achievements earned:

Personal Achievements
 
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 9:15am

ACHIEVEMENT WHORE

Unlock all achievements
Unlocked Jun 13, 2017 @ 7:26am

1-800-CLEARED

Finish the game
Unlocked Sep 21, 2017 @ 6:49am

1-800-GETHELP

Finish the game on hard mode
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 7:52am

1-800-GODDAMN

Get A+ on all levels on normal
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 3:45am

NUCLEAR WASTE

They won't reach the Nuclear Throne
Unlocked Jun 1, 2017 @ 8:37am

FANTASTIC!

Unlock all the Fans
Unlocked Jun 10, 2017 @ 10:40am

THESE ARE MY RIFLES, THESE ARE MY GUNS...

Unlock all weapons for the Soldier
Unlocked Jun 9, 2017 @ 5:09am

SNAKE CHARMER

Unlock all snake masks
Unlocked Jun 12, 2017 @ 4:42am

WHAT YOU LEAVE FOR YOUR SONS

Unlock all of the Son's techniques
Unlocked Sep 19, 2017 @ 4:33am

FANATIC

Clear a level with each Fan
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 2:25am

FAMILY BUSINESS

Clear a level with each of the Son's techniques
Unlocked Jul 20, 2017 @ 3:36am

SNAKES ON A HEAD

Clear a level with each snake mask
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 2:44am

DON'T LET ANGER GET THE BEST OF YOU

Clear all of the Writer's levels without killing
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 3:39am

EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT!

Get the big picture
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 9:15am

A BOX FULL OF SHARP OBJECTS

Use every weapon in the game at least once
Unlocked Jun 2, 2017 @ 4:33am

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE

Destroy 100 electronic devices
Unlocked Jun 2, 2017 @ 2:51am

KARMA

Die 1000 times
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 2:14am

GENOCIDE

Kill 50,000 enemies
Unlocked Aug 12, 2017 @ 5:33pm

GOT YOUR BACK

Shoot two enemies during a chainsaw finish
Unlocked Sep 16, 2017 @ 3:51am

FOLLOW THE SCRIPT

Do as the Director says!
Unlocked Sep 16, 2017 @ 4:05am

ASSASSIN'S CRED

Clear the 1st floor of NO MERCY with the silencer
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 2:38am

DEAD SILENT

Finish SUBWAY without the Gang Leader seeing you
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 2:20am

I'M COMING IN AND I'M UNARMED!

Finish HOMICIDE without using guns
Unlocked Sep 12, 2017 @ 2:25am

STARE INTO THE ABYSS

Unlock THE ABYSS
Unlocked Sep 23, 2017 @ 3:19am

THE BAR OF BROKEN HEROES

Meet up with the Biker
Unlocked Apr 24, 2017 @ 3:28am

COMBO BEGINNER

Perform a 5x combo
Unlocked Jun 1, 2017 @ 8:31am

COMBO INTERMEDIATE

Perform a 10x combo
Unlocked Jun 2, 2017 @ 4:28am

COMBO MASTER

Perform a 15x combo
Unlocked Aug 6, 2017 @ 3:39pm

COMBO GOD

Perform a 20x combo