When I was 8 I tried to inflate my penis with a soccer ball pump. I'd heard of penis pumps but looking back I didn't quite understand the concept.

I stuck the needle into my urethra and inflated a few pushes. It gave me A half chub and a strong urge to urinate. I tried to go per but I just kinda farted out of my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ and the per splattered everywhere like a sprinkler. 20 years later I get sharp pains randomly when I urinate. I'm almost positive I have a urethral structure.

hey, sorry i saw your profile and i just thought you looked cute in your picture, i really wanted to tell you that)) it's really rare to see boys playing video games haha! i don't know its a guy thing honestly im like really against misogyny and like ill be the one in the kitchen making sandwhiches. we should really play l4d2 sometimes its a really cool zombie game with a lot fo scary moments, but dont worry ill be there to protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirting i swear im just trying to be friendly i really like your profile picture sorry was that too far? really sorry im really shy i don't go out much haha add me on skype we should talk more you look really nice and fun xxx

Hey I found your steam through a mutual and I just wanted to say that I think we could get along real well :) I don't normally do things like this cause I'm a real gentleman :3, but do you want to maybe play a bit of cs sometime (omg I'm so embarrassed) >< I could go on my smurf so you don't have to put in that much effort, even though you're like the best and you'll probably be on top every round. When I see your name I just feel like we have this special connection that I can't describe in words, I think.. maybe we knew each other in a past life xDD like I can do the cooking and everything, you don't have to worry about that cuz I'm a real feminist, but I'll still take care of you <3 I know how to make a woman feel like a girl, but I won't do anything that freaks you out, just say one word and I'll stop so so fast! so maybe just consider me? I can't believe I'm writing this all out to you >< !! Even if you reject me it's all worth it just for you, my wuv <3 (plz don't reject me !!)

beans

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