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Prior to my current job I was testing the market for shaving cream for the government. Developed several new methods for getting to know fried chicken with no outside help. Garnered an industry award while building toy trucks in West Palm Beach, FL. Earned praise for my work building Roombas for the underprivileged. Spent 2002-2010 analyzing human brains for no pay. What gets me going now is managing pubic lice in Gillman, Colorado.

I am currently a Quantification Watchman at Opaque Banana Cybersecurity .
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