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8 of 10 (80%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

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Unlocked Mar 4, 2017 @ 5:46am

Click on door 430 five times.

Click on door 430 five times.
Unlocked Mar 4, 2017 @ 5:33am

Achievement

This is an achievement.
Unlocked Mar 4, 2017 @ 4:46am

Welcome back!

Quit the game and then start it again.
Unlocked Feb 13, 2017 @ 10:44am

You can't jump

No seriously, we disabled it.
Unlocked Mar 4, 2017 @ 4:55am

Go outside

Don't play The Stanley Parable for five years.
Unlocked Mar 4, 2017 @ 5:49am

Beat the game

Complete The Stanley Parable.
Unlocked Mar 4, 2017 @ 5:18am

Unachievable

It is impossible to get this achievement.
Unlocked Mar 4, 2017 @ 5:54am



Commitment

Play The Stanley Parable for the entire duration of a Tuesday.

Speed run

Complete The Stanley Parable in under 4 minutes 22 seconds (not including load times)