HAL (over) 9000 !   Arkansas, United States
:Aggressive: : "DAVE?"
:spaceinvader: : "Right, man; Dave. Now will you open up the door?"
:Aggressive: : "DAVE'S NOT HERE."

the shrieking of nothing is killing :feeling: just pictures of Jap girls in synthesis :suguri:
ain't got no money :penny: and I ain't got no hair :ci4egg: i'm hoping to kick :mkbear: :bsod: :colorbars:
but the planet :blueplanet: it's glowing :americaflag: glowing :PresidentTrump: glowing :BoomBoom: glowing :cry: -- Bowie

"Cold, and broken, but still good. Yeah, still good." -- Stitch Cohen
vile, foul, flawed, old, mean, bitter, gray, cute, fluffy

the stars in the sky ; impossible pi ; child's innocent eyes

"I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is
all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do." -- 2001

A lady walks into a bar in 2014. Ethan Hawke is bartending. He breaks the ice and the fourth wall, and spoils the spoiler, by saying he saw Uma as Venus. This isn't a television.

"Tear on tear, entire" -- Goethe

"Do you really think that love is going to change the world? I sure hope so. I really, really hope so. But I don't think so." -- Cardigans

"The Game never ends, and your whole world depends, on the turn of a friendly card." -- Alan Parsons

"Whatever doesn't kill you simply makes you stranger" -- The Joker

"When the going gets wierd, the wierd go pro." -- Tacoma

"It's never clear ; it's pantomime" -- Ric Ocasek

"How long shall they kill our prophets while we stand aside and look?" -- Bob Marley

"Everyday i write the book." -- Elvis Costello

"Come on in, girls, but leave all hope behind. You've got to work fast, because you've got to get out in ten minutes." -- A Night At The Opera

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Last Online 7 hrs, 10 mins ago
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Michael Suggs IRL: from TX A&M, Texarkana, HOU, DFW, AUS, ATL, Birmingham, Hope, Prescott
as Gandhi, Spanky, Namedotcom, NDC, Indice, Clef, Hal Overninethousand :aggressive: on fb [soup cup]
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Created by - ¡OOO67VH
b r a i n s p o t t i n g
Roomie Learns Chemistry Part 2
(Hal is working on an invention down the hall)

Roomie: "Why do I smell paint thinner in my room?"
Hal (distantly): "Sorry."
Roomie: "This is not paint thinner. What is this smell?
Roomie: "IS THIS TOXIC?"
Hal (distantly): "I'm really, really sorry."

The JKRowling Strain

(Roomie laptop midterms bed)
(hoarse post-flu Hal hobbles in)
Roomie: "I got a spot on my back that hurts."
(Hoarse Hal ignores the want to say 'i'm fine; f*** you very much')

(Hoarse Hal hobbles over and lays hand on Roomie's back)
(being made of mostly womans, Roomie folds completely in half)
(this is way too far, and looks vaguely umm...)

(Roomie unfolds and tosses some dirty clothes on which she was sitting)

Roomie: "Oh! I'm doing laundry. I used your quarters."
(Hoarse Hal is just standing there)
Roomie: "Annd I used your Emergency Money to get more quarters."

(Hoarse Hal thinks for a second)
(Hoarse Hal still has a hole in his car radiator)
Hal: "hhhhHONK ssss hhH kk hhhh."

Roomie: "I'm going to assume that means you're not mad."
(hoarse Hal speaks Perseltongue For Aquatic Fowl several more times)

(Hoarse Hal lets out The Long Sigh That Only Incapacitated Men Know How To Conjure)

Roomie: "Hey, this is great! I wonder what else I can confess, since you can't spea--- oops."
(Roomie completely covers her face)
(Roomie's Arm points to a towel on the floor)
Roomie: "I had this great idea to put the laundry detergent on my clothes first."
Hal: " ... hhh sss?"
Roomie: "So I wouldn't have to carry the heavy detergent to the washroom."

(Hal sees Blue all over the towel on the floor)
(Hal sees The Very Dark Shiny Kitchen)
Hal: " ... hhhhhHONK?"
Roomie: "It worked! Most of it soaked in [the laundry]. It kinda worked."

(Hal cautiously skates one foot across The Kitchen Entrance Of Absolute Doom)
Roomie: "Well, I figured it out. I know now. Whatever."

(Hal raises hands and freezes like a statue of Our Esteemed Leader W T F)

Hal: " ... sss hhhh ffff kkkk ?"
Roomie: "When you go away so that I don't have to admit my mistake."
Hal: " ...fff..."
Roomie (grand hand motions): "VOOMP! SILENCE!"

Roomie.readpost == 'uh-huh';
Roomie: "You forgot to mention that I slammed my head into my car door before My Laundry Idea. But, yeah, this is legit."

Only A Few Minutes With Roomie: You Cannot Even

Roomie (down the hall): "I'm naked. May I ask your opinion?"
Hal: "Y-, y--, y--. The correct answer is... yyyyes?"
Roomie (distantly): "Don't worry; I'm putting on clothes to come in there and ask you."
Hal (sighs): "So your nakedness and my opinion are two totally separate things, right?"
Roomie: "No."

(moments later)
(Roomie walks in)

Roomie: "Well, since you're Steaming, I guess I'd better say this : I came in here to ask for your advice, but I'm going to make a statement instead."
Hal: "Say Goodnight, Gracie."
Roomie: "OK, there have been several scientific studies that have been done on this, but I believe in my heart they are wrong."
Hal: "Please, God*****, Say Goodnight."
(Roomie delivers a speech)
Hal (laughing and crying): "Stop... Please stop... Stop... Stop... Stop... Please."

(moments later)

Roomie (calling out): "Stop your Steaming. I'm trying to watch YouTube."
(a viola concerto immediately starts playing)
Hal: "That sounds like Rachmaninoff. What is that?"
Roomie (distantly): "My alarm. It's pretty!"

(moments later)

Roomie: "I'm getting ready for work. Come here and tell me a story or some shit."
(Hal slowly walks in)
Hal: "You were wearing clothes... You're wearing... your blanket."
Roomie: "Blankie protects me from murderers and rapists and guns. My blankie ensures that I will not die."
Hal: "Your arms and legs are sticking out. You look like a turtle."
Roomie: "Does Not Matter. Blankie Protects All. It's a girl thing."

(moments later)

Roomie: "I need a sock."
(Hal gets a brand new pair of socks from his little universe)
(Hal walks in and hands over the socks)
Roomie: "Just one, thanks."
Roomie: "It's a girl thing. Oh, there's a new officer in town. And I don't know if he's 'I'm Going To Throw You In Jail'-sort of scared of me, or if he's 'Oh S*** I'm Never Going To Throw You In F***ing Jail'-sort of scared of me."


Hal: "Roomie, if perchance the world ends, it will not be your fault. Others will plot and scheme and place the detonator on the floor and you will trip over it and Oops I The Planet."

(Roomie starts crying profusely)

Roomie: "Crack-head-skull-f***ing-f***er. I hope you get cancer of the entire head."
Hal (trying so very hard not to laugh): "Here. My Bad. Let me give you a hug."
Roomie: ""THE F*** NO you will not. You're a F*** You right now. You said I would depozzate the world!"

(Hal gives her a hug)

Roomie: "You do not get the arms. You do not deserve the arms. You are a F*** You. I am going to Super Saiyan your ass through the wall."

(Hal walks away)

Roomie: "My forgiveness can be bought with you starting my car."
Hal (singing Beatles): "It can't get much worse."

(Hal grabs her keys and opens the door)
(Hal has a thought and stops)

Roomie: "Dit-dit-dit-dit! You wre about to do something for me and You Were That Close!"
Hal: "But-"
(Roomie takes The Angry Bitch Stance and points to the car)

(moments later)
(Roomie is crying again, putting on makeup)

Roomie: "I'm trying not to be re-mad at you. You said I was going to dessenate the world! All my life, I've wanted to help the world, and I finally figured it out, and you said I was going to dezallate the world! Oh, I need to borrow some money."

(blank stare)

Roomie: "I need some face epoxy. I need to close my damn pores forever."
Hal: "Roomie, your pores..."
Roomie: "Shut up! There you go, opening your mouth again. You're making this so much worse. And when your pores are bigger than Jesus, the sumbitches need to be closed forever."
(Hal falls down, howling)
Roomie: "Hal. HAL F***ING CHRIST! Did you not hear me say to shut up and give me money? I get paid Monday. Face pores now!"
Hal (from the floor): "I got an H.F.C. out of you! I'm so happy!"

(moments later)

(Roomie grabs $4 of Hal's $8 Left)
(Roomie freezes)
(Roomie grabs $8 of Hal's $8 Left)
Roomie: "I'm really late..."
(Roomie runs out the door)
Roomie: "...and I may have forgotten to mention that I'm on my period."

F M M F It Just Won't Stop

(the sound of Something That Costs More Than Ten Bucks echoes down the hall)

Roomie: " ( garble garble ) Hal ( garble )"
Hal (down hall): "WHAT."
Roomie: "Nothing. I'm just blaming you for something."
Hal: "WHAT."
Roomie: "It's not your fault. I'm just blaming you."
Roomie: "That's why I'm blaming you! You're not in here!"

(moments later)
(Hal saunters in)

Roomie: "Oh, and I'm learning to tell when I'm [hypo]manic. Like now."
Hal: "Good?"
Roomie: "Except when I am, I don't care. Like now. And I need a pair of pants badly."
Hal: "You're wearing new pants. The tag's still on them."
Roomie: "You ruin everything. Oh, and I picked up the scale and dropped it accidentally because it's a LIAR!"

Review Showcase
10.0 Hours played
Cogs meets Myst. Minimalist art. Japanese puzzle box with a computer mouse.

Hella rewarding. In my personal Utopia, this game would have more sequels than CoD.
It's beautiful. It looks great in a red dress. I think I'm in love with it.
Favorite Guide
Created by - Nemesis
72 ratings
How to play with all Downloadable Content on Steam
ココナツ | SOS-団 Apr 22 @ 6:29pm 
Hi there! :wnheart:
¡OOO67VH Apr 22 @ 5:49pm 
:GoldenH: :99: :charlotte: :lexi: :blueduck: :GoldenH:
¡OOO67VH Apr 21 @ 5:10pm 
How is Roomie? Had to take her to the doctor. She's gone three times now. Not good.
Keep her in your thoughts... or in your scope.

Life happens to everyone. But there's a cure for it.
Just keep looking at the flowers; you'll see the roots soon enough.
unoven005 Apr 14 @ 8:28am 
(✿◠‿◠) Happy weekend N songkran day! (◠‿◠✿)
¡OOO67VH Apr 11 @ 2:31am 
bonus points & ++rep for creative descriptors &/or autistic-spectrum chain cursing.
e.g., Roomie ...
... and most every other close friend I ever had. :rip: :rip: :rip: :cry:
¡OOO67VH Apr 10 @ 2:50am 
comment I felt obligated to pasta [props to Helevorn]:

Maximum Geek is a title not reached by having parents purchase a matching vidya card for Xmas for SLI ; it is reached by utilizing whatever silicon is available, then coding and playing the hell out of it until it fries. It's a love and am efficiency others can barely comprehend.