Warhammer 40,000: Eternal Crusade

Warhammer 40,000: Eternal Crusade

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a day in the life of sulyvan
11:30 : mom wakes me up because i overslept
super tired because the party was wild yesterday. 56 kills with my trusty stormbolter. all my friends on the chaos team cheered me. they called me ni* *er and a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ but it is our joke between us, i know they like me
i made sure to insult all the LSM team so they know they are pathetic trash and i am the alpha male champion of khorne.

i go now to eat breakfast. mom left me 3 bags of cheetos before leaving for work.
vinegar, my favorite. i love my mamita so much.

12:45 : i get a call from the unemployment office
my councelor told me they had an open position at the grocery store down the street. is he serious ? even though i know he is twice my size i almost screamed at him. he is lucky i am good person.
but do he not know how smart i am ? i dont need job stocking shelves
i should have better because i am very smart and not many people are like me and have complex brain like i have.
i am so tired how everyone doesnt understand i am more smart. i explain it everyday but they always forget.
intellect is such a burden

13:36 time for my workout.
i do some nordic walk to the supermarket to buy chocolate coins and 3 pounds of salt. on the way back i make a hole in the bag with my finger to lick it.
yum yum ! i am happy

13:52 back to home.
i power up my computer (i9 800K radeon ryzen with 180 gb SSD watercooled, 1080ti, and RGB keyboard:)) and then i spend a few hours watching the recordings from yesterday so i can edit
my 34th youtube video of making 60 kills against random pubs for my 27 subscribers.

16:20 i get a call from the doctor office.

the results of my tests came back. he tells me i do not have AIDS but my blood pressure is higher than a sperm whale on ketamine and that i should stop eating so much salt.
i tell him he is a ♥♥♥♥♥♥, and hang up.

17:44 finally enough people on eternal crusade.
the matches have started and i go to pegasus.
we are winning but i joined 58 seconds late and Magiceus have more kills than me. i leave the match because i cannot be number #1 and i dislike injustice

19:12 mom call me for diner. i dont go because i am playing eternal crusade

19:37 mom bring my fajitas to my room. i can finally eat
i finish quickly because my team will miss me if i am not here for carry.

21:14 chapter master spex teabag me because i was playing despacito too loud and mamita knocked on the wall, disturbing me

22:38 ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ in chat tell me i am ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ so i have to explain why i am smart

23:59 we lose canyon because my team didnt play the objective while i was spawncamping the junkyard

00:30 getting a bit tired. i will only play for 3 more hours because it is late.

5:33 noobs lsm have stopped playing because i destroy them too hard. i now go to bed.
another day of victory for the smart champion of khorne.

5:45 as i lay in bed awaiting another dreamless night, i have few moments to think about how i spent the best part of the day insulting strangers on the internet
with genuine empathy, i pity my haters
how sad must they feel ?

they are not Sulyvan...
Last edited by metalman666; 23 May @ 4:12pm
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Mars 23 May @ 6:22pm 
How Sulyvan will ever recover?
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