Recent reviews by owLy

There are some cars in it and uhhh

Dereks Notes...

Day 1. Timmy was stolen by large aboriginal with sad...sad eyes and a trusting smile.
Day 2. I called for Timmy, realised that he is deaf and I spent the best years of his childhood drinking into a tankard and ignoring the fact that he is disabled.
Day 3. Found a lizard, skinned the sucker. Enjoyed its raw flesh crossing the threshold of my moist delicate mouth.
Day 4. Found shipwreck, investigated private bedroom.
Day 4.5. Found captains hentai stash. Electric Boogaloo...I'm going insane and miss my son.
Day 6 (decided 5 isn't a number anymore). Found another Lizard, named it Larry then decapitated it with my bare hands and threw its head at a mutant in form of protest to them stealing my son and accidentally burning my hentai.
Day 7. Moved onto a home crafted boat...boat sank. Back to square one. This island is a tomb.
Day 8. Found an old copy of garfield kart shoved inside a retro gaming box, started playing it until mutants found my temporary camp and molested me, on the trot.
Day 8. Timmy appeared from the forest and the game credits roled...that was easier than I thought it would be tbh.

8/10 would burn the bodies of mutants in front of their kin.

Garfield Kart is an innovative and easy to learn kart based circuit orientated racing simulator that relies heavily on precise timing and skillful use of pies.

When playing as Odie I saw a sizeable increase in my own shaft length, and also found that winning is easy as long as you have a controller. However, there are three very important qualities to this masterpiece I must list.
- Intensely beautiful graphics, I found myself unable to race due to my awe in the production quality...and from such a small team!
- wonderful community feeling, when playing with friends, we all laugh and have fun!
- Doesn't inspire toxicity...this game brought me closer to god! I love jesus!

Amen.

Black and Purple...

Portal 2 is a masterpiece. The multiplayer is fantastic and offers around 7-8 hours of play with a competent friend, with suitably difficult challenges and glados providing funny messages and putting Atlas down, making him feel like a piece of ♥♥♥♥. I was always Atlas and for that reason alone I deduct one star off this games rating for bullying.

The campaign is good fun, with good puzzles and interesting dialogue. Graphics are nice. You don't need to open any cases or equip gloves so It works for me.

I give portal 2 a solid 8/10, with an MVP for multiplayer taunts.

Was created by the bourgeoise.

This games title is very misleading folks. You don't dodge sounds...you dodge spikes.
Very disappointing.

Brawlhalla is a mixed bag...

The game has a great concept, a pretty lively community and an active esports scene.
I'm going to make this easy and make a list:

Pros:
- Active esports scene
- Fun with friends
- Cool character choice
- Nice market with relatively fair prices
- Good gamemode options (1v1, 2v2, snowbrawl, bombhalla, weekly bonus etc)
- 2v2 is great with friends
- Really good dev team that are always working to patch and improve the game.

Cons:
- Poor ranking system, I feel like I'm often put with people who are far above my skill level and sometimes makes it hard to keep playing
- Game encourages spamming, it is far easier to sit and spam side sigs than to try and play smart. Most people have never touched the light attack button and just spam from side to side, I know this can be countered but it isnt very easy and puts new players off (many of my friends have uninstalled due to getting spammed in free for alls and 1v1)
- Community is a little salty from time to time. Everyone hates having a close match and someone goes "EZ EZ".
- Potato servers
- Hit detection is hard to learn and many hitboxes make no sense whatsoever.

Overall, I would recommend the game. But I feel there are things that need to be fixed and changed up before I would call it one of my favourite games.

I don't need sex, because Ubisoft ♥♥♥♥♥ me everyday.

The Uplay launcher has made it impossible to play for me. I have tryed nearly everything but the launcher crashes and rejects my valid email!

I stopped buying uplay games ages ago. They annoy me too much.

Taataa and farewell!

wow...just cause 2 is a huge imporvement from the first. The graphics are supreme to pretty much every other game I have payed from that year. All you do..is blow stuff up, to cause chaos...to unlock missions of causing chaos!
The multiplayer is still buggy and crashes, but all round is a lot of fun.
For $10/£10, its definatelly worth a buy!

Very addictive. You willl download it thinking you will only spend a little while on it.
50+ hours clocked on it and you will be thinking. What went wrong?
Good, addictive game that seems like its rewarding but all its doing is wasting your life.
Still good though