Important shit.

Hardcore bagel and cheesewheel lovers.
You have to have a 3-4inch penis like dick rark(3inchpenisguy)
and prov(4inchpenisman)
If you have a 12+ inch penis, then your name is Angel the BagelWench.

Sometimes we serve our trademark bagels,
with de-caf coffee and creamcheese.
Bagel whip.
Luigi bagels.

Butter on bagels is for pussies.
Cheesewheels are win as fuck.
We dont have time for un-bagel bullshit, Bagtards, Bagel-Holes, or Bagel-Heads.

We play Call of Bagel 4: Modern Cheesewheel, Metal Bagel Solid 4,
Grand Theft Bagel 4, Bagel Fantasy XIII, Bagel Hero 1 2 & 3,
Half-Bagel 2, Bagel-Strike:Source, Team Bagels 2, Garry's Bagel,
and B.A.G.E.L. - Shadow of CheeseWheel.

-The Bagel Dev Team

On another note,
A little piece from Dick Rark:

Why do you co-exist in our world? Your views of existance are just a mere facade of pop culture and disillusion.
Why shelter yourself from the truth? Why conform with the ideologies of the world that will ultimately divert you into
a lie? A lie about yourself. A lie about the world you thought you believed in. The world is afraid to admit that it
is beneath the superiority of a super power; A super power that hides underneath every insignificant detail that you constantly
overlook in your insignificant life.

The world cannot comprehend the power of... Bagels