Recent reviews by Yij

Very simple and overall not a bad video editor.... not well refined though and prone to crashing frequently.

- Recommended if you have money to waste and just want to edit very simple videos.

- Not recommended for anyone wanting to do any advanced video editing or actual professionals.

Let's start with the good. It's a very simple and easy to use editor, and you can get started right away without having to read up tutorials or get an online degree in codecs and all that fancy crap teh average user doesn't care about. Very slick and easy to use interface, plus friendly controls. It's so simple to use, I often use it just to quickly cut up and convert videos in less than 5 minutes. Top stuff!

But...

There are the problems, which all add up.

I don't use many video editors so I'm not sure how problematic it is, but Movavi does take it's sweet time to start up. Often I'd double click the program and nothing would happen, then it would start loading the program some 10-20 seconds later.

Trying to implement watermarks in your videos is really hit and miss: yes, it does work, however right at the last half second or so of your exported video, the watermark dissapears, which kind of renders the whole thing pointless. Best workaround is to extend the watermark longer than the actual video, export the video, reimport this video and cut off the ending. But that's just extra work that frankly, you shouldn't need to do.

Now I did say the interface and controls were very good, although there is a bit of an issue with selecting some of the text/number boxes. Like in 99% of other programs you'd just hold down the left mouse button and drag in the box and it will select everything inside that box: however in this one you have to be really precise, as if you move the mouse outside the box a bit too much, everything get's deselected. Just why?

The biggest problem so far is the crashing. Yes, there most likely isn't an editor on Earth that never crashes, however the amount of times Movavi can crash is insane. I had a project with only 3 videos: each of which were less than 3 seconds long, and some audio clips: hardly the most complex thing in the world. Movavi literally crashed every 1-3 minutes when I was working with this project. On the plus side, it seems to save after every edit as I was able to bounce right back where I left off, but that really is a band-aid solution to a bigger problem, one that you're ultimately paying for with your hard earned money.

Overall, I spent £22 on Movavi during an Xmas sale and somewhat regret it. I should have gotten the tried and tested Sony Vegas editor, but instead I went for the underdog. I will say however it's perfectly fine and dandy if you're doing very small edits and have zero desire in doing anything more advanced than sticking a few videos together and putting on fancy effects. Anything more than that, then prepare for crash city. But even at £22, it's still alot for something that can really only handle very basic editing.

Also the company support is pretty piss poor as they just reply the same copy and pasted response on all negative reviews.

To put in summary, Movavi is like that kid in the classroom who says he can draw the Mona Lisa, ride a Tricycle, balance a few plates on his nose and perform archery... all at the same time. However at best, he just about manage a few stick figures, maaaybe push around a small cart, and you can forget about the rest as he's just going to keep falling over every 3 steps. Movavi is that hapless kid.

Summary
A true retro shooter experience and one of my most anticipated games of 2020, Perilous Warp is nearly everything I want in a retro FPS. The only problem is that having completed the game in just under 6 hours, I’m really desperate for more, yet there is no more… yet.

Let’s not beat around the bush: Perilous Warp is a GENUINE old-school retro shooter throwback, heavily inspired by Chasm, Half-Life and Unreal. It looks fantastic and plays just like how our generation of games did back in the day. 100% legit. Just a shame it’s extremely short, with promised content plus a free SDK in the future only serving to create blue balls syndrome.

Recommended for: Real old school gaming veterans who yearn for a true retro FPS, but tired of pixel art or modern day pretenders.

Not recommended for: those looking for a long game or anything groundbreaking.

Graphics and performance
Perilous Warp is one of the best looking games I’ve seen to date and is a serious contender for the (extremely) overrated Unreal 4. The developers have understood fantastic graphics isn’t just about chucking 300 effects at the player: it’s about using 3 effects, but to maximum effect. Less is more.

Imagine it’s 2002-2004: 3D acceleration is evolving at breakneck speed and more games are utilizing shaders, yet super realism was still years away from happening. Perilous Warp is what games during that era were striving for. Everything is clean and crisp. Texture work is consistent throughout the levels, and you won’t be finding a 4K rock next to an object that looks like it came from a PS2 game. The environments themselves feel believable and whilst not always making sense, are downright gorgeous to navigate in and during the hectic moments of bloodshed, I often like to stop and just gawp at how amazing the visuals look. There’s usually always pillars supporting the infrastructure, lights embedded into recesses illuminating walkways, machinery quietly working away, or broken away pieces of wall that could potentially be hiding a cheeky secret. I’d even catch myself stopping in what should be a boring corridor, and just gawping at how amazing it still looks despite being barren.

The lighting and shadow really steal the show here, with levels rich in dynamic shadows, yet not bathed in black obscurity. It’s even more rewarding when a creature of unknown origin shambles towards you, it’s looming shadow just as threatening as the creature itself is. On that note, NPCs do look pretty generic: just some humanoid things with sharp claws and even sharper teeth. I do believe the enemy roster is enough to count on a single hand alone, so variety isn’t a strong suite sadly.

There’s also a dedicated “Retro Mode” that disables filtering whilst downscaling texture resolution (up to 8x I believe). You know, just in case you somehow still don’t believe a 30-something year old gamer that Perilous Warp was the look game engines were trying to achieve back then. You can lead a horse to water…

It’s also nice to play a recently released game that doesn’t have blurry TAA, blinding bloom, 4k rocks, and finally polished floors that function as an up-skirt voyeurs wet dream. Seriously, can modern games stop with these overuse of effects? Game developers take note: Perilous Warp IS the real deal to base yourself on. And don’t even think about lazily applying a pixel-filter and calling it a day... eh Prodeus?

Music and Sound
The music is pretty decent and quite fitting to the theme of the game and the era it emulates, and reminds me of Chaser, however I did have to tone it down to about 30% as it can start to get repetitive after a while. Whilst it’s not playlist worthy, the soundtrack compliments the game’s atmosphere, and you won’t have to suffer with any of the harsh distracting music many modern games cherish.

As for the sound effects in general, they’re pretty good, but I feel the weapons could sound a bit beefier. Thankfully, the game is moddable right from the get go, so I quickly sorted that out.

Gameplay
Perilous Warp never intends to reinvent the wheel, and that’s mighty fine. As a retro shooter, Perilous Warp delivers just that, and if you grew up in the Half-Life and Quake era, you will feel right at home. You’re ultimate goal is to ultimately find the teleporter that takes you to the next level, while along the way increasing your (upgradable) arsenal, hunting keycards, and of course, massacring anything that has sharp teeth and a pulse. There’s also PDA’s that unravel the story plus a few secrets to discover, should you choose to do so.

The gunplay itself while not fantastic, is quite serviceable. It would be nice to receive better feedback from enemies and the environment as monsters tend to just soak up damage with minimal reaction until they keel over and ragdoll. Whilst the AI is fairly basic, they do have a habit of being able to dodge a hurling rocket or spinning disc right at the last moment, which can put a spanner in the works from time to time.

On the plus side, you can dismember enemies that can literally disarm them, which I don’t see often in FPS games. Rocket trooper harassing you with constant rocket fire? Blast that bastard’s arm off so all he can do is nibble your nose off! It’s fantastic stuff that can turn the tide of a battle, especially in hard mode!

And that’s pretty much it. There’s also some underwater sections, as well as some (sadly underused) rope climbing mechanics. What, were you expecting to chainsaw someone for ammo or engage in branching storylines? Haha.

On a quick note, hard mode is HARD, and will add more dangerous enemies in each level than in normal mode, so it’s great the devs actually gave some thought to level design and difficulty, rather than the safe option of just making every existing enemy do more damage (as most modern games lazily do). Good stuff!

Negatives/bugs
I won’t lie, some segments of the game are pure ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. Getting locked in a small room whilst having to mow down waves of enemies casually teleporting in is just boring, especially when you just face off solely against poorly animated scorpions or those leaping dog things. It would also seem the level designer must have been on holiday during these sections, as one minute you’ll be slowly navigating through an intricate space station full of detail and wonder, only to be sealed off in a barren courtyard that looks like it was made in 5 minutes.

Other times, the game has a habit of sneakily teleporting in an enemy right in the middle of a corridor or next to an ammo pick up when you least suspect it. Whilst Perilous Warp isn’t meant to define the genre, I do feel like the whole arena fights and teleporting monsters should really be left in the past at this point.

Muzzle flashes don’t light up the surrounding area.

Normal mode is way too easy, whilst hard can be extremely difficult at times to the point of feeling unfair. Rest assured, your quicksave button is going to get a workout during this mode.


Conclusion
Perilous Warp is a satisfying romp that sadly, like that hot exotic girl you just met shortly before your flight home, ends way too quickly and has you begging for more. The visuals are absolutely solid, the atmosphere is stellar and whilst the gunplay won’t win any awards, this is pure and refined old school retro shooting at it’s finest. With the promise of Multiplayer plus bots, a small campaign and even a free SDK, the potential for this game is immense, and as I’ve experienced already, the game is moddable from the get go.

To wrap things up, Perilous Warp is like that favourite relative you see once a year overseas for a day that, without fail, cooks the best dishes in the entire world, gives the best presents, and tells you fantastic stories around the fire. It’s the kind of game you still think about hours after switching off, and just fantasize what the future holds for it.

And for me, that magic is priceless.

Really nice short and sweet map pack! Traverse some underground mine segments, escape to the surface and have a final showdown with a flying boss enemy.

Nicely constructed levels that echo what made the original HL2 great: a few minor puzzles involving grenades, subtle sound and visual clues, as well as a good lead up to the final encounter.

Took around 40 minutes, so it's really short and sweet. And thank god no forced gravity gun or vehicle segments!

Summary
A more condensed version of SGW3… but not necessarily better. Still, it’s a fairly fun game focusing on sniping, infiltration and exfiltration. Whether you want to do things using stealth or subterfuge, or would rather tote an assault rifle and some grenades, Contracts has you covered. Also no multiplayer mode as of yet.

- Recommended for people who like the SGW series, the IGI games, or first person sneakers (who can forgive the jank)

- Not recommended for people expecting open-world Ubishite or highly polished gameplay

Graphics and performance
Whilst contracts is by no means a next-gen game, it still looks decent. The world is colourful (when it’s not bloody snowing) and the draw distance is pretty good. The environment, characters and weapons all look the part and whilst the textures aren’t the sharpest in the world (or as good as the previous title) the quality is mostly consistent throughout.

Sadly, the whole thing is smothered by everyone’s favourite anti-aliasing (TAA?) that makes everything a little blurry, which I haven’t found a way to disable without glitches.

Generally, the game runs smooth nearly all the time, although there are quite a few instances involving frame rate drops and there is noticeable stuttering during checkpoints, which happens fairly often throughout the levels. A little hit and miss, especially for a title looking like this.

Music and Sound
The music is OK and while not worthy of an iPod playlist, suits the game very well and gives it a distinct secret agent/assassin personality. However, everytime you go into battle you will hear the same single music track over, and over again. It got to the point where I had to mute it for my own sanity.

SFX are pretty good, and most of the guns sound delightfully punchy and appropriate, and whilst I’m not fond of hitmarkers, I won’t deny the feedback sound you get when a bullet smacks an enemy in the face 200m away is quite satisfying. Automatic gun sounds could do with some work, though.

Voice acting is ok, although I’m not fond of your hander’s voice at all. That distorted effect overlayed ontop of him? Sounds like nails on a chalkboard. Whoever came up with that idea needs to be fired and banned from working in the video games industry.

Gameplay
I know what you’re thinking. Pristine white menus with contrasting red highlights, the edgy (and very boring) briefing videos, the emphasis on fewer bite-sized levels but with "Open-ended contracts, bounties and challenges deliver strong replayability"... If the title didn’t give it away, Contracts borrows heavily from the latest Hitman games… a little too much.

With 5 fairly large maps (3 are snowy, 2 are foresty) to chose from, a disappointingly limited selection of weapons and some gadgets (most of which went underused), you’re let loose into the world where you can sneak, snipe and shoot to your heart’s content.

The maps themselves are quite varied, ranging from a harbour district, to a train station and even a secluded mansion hidden in the mountains. From here, you’re given a handful of objectives to complete (kill some VIP, blow something up, etc) and how you complete them is up to you.

As the title suggests, the emphasis is on sniping, so there are plenty of high vantage points to take advantage of. From here you can use your binoculars and aerial drone to tag enemies, then take people out with your chosen high velocity rifle. You’ll need to adjust zoom and elevation in accordance to how far away your target is (due to bullet drop) and now there is a very helpful dotted line that shows how far the bullet with deviate due to the wind. Your bullets are physical objects in the game world so you’ll most likely miss as a result of human error (as opposed to the Sniper Elite series where the game decides if you hit the enemy or not). Moreover, you can literally blow off heads and limbs, and watching people grab their severed arm and staring at it before feinting really is something we don’t often see in modern gaming.

If sniping isn’t your thing or you’ve already taken out key sentries, you can always opt to sneak into enemy strongholds, by various zip ropes, convenient crouched-sized vents, or broken walls that very obviously need repairing. Honestly, the different methods of infiltration are very disappointing compared to SGW3, but hey, they’re better than nothing. You can also hack cameras (which annoyingly auto-tag enemies for you), disable turrets and interrogate enemies for information… such as revealing where enemy soldiers are to auto-tag them for you. Tags, tags, tags.

If you generally aren’t a fan of the quiet option or the entire base goes on alert thanks to a single enemy spotting you, shooting your way through is, of course, a completely viable option. As per the last game, the shooting isn’t great but works. Enemies go down in a few hits but once you meet those heavies, it’s time to use explosives are focus your fire into them. Enemies are fairly aggressive, with the ability to shoot your eyebrows from miles away (more details further below) and on the hardest difficulty, can kill you in less than a second.

You can upgrade your character, although I honestly didn’t find the upgrades that much useful. Since I don’t use wallhacks and X-Ray vision, I completely ignored the mask upgrade. There’s no point choosing upgrades to carry extra ammo, since you get so much from looting supplies and corpses dotted around the map. Some of them I couldn’t even unlock, because I didn’t do enough stupid challenges the game wants me to do.

Ah, yes, the challenges. Kill 2 enemies at once 10 times, shoot people through cover 5 times, back-flip off a cliff and headshot a guy 269m away at the same time… that sort of tedious ♥♥♥♥. And you’re locking upgrade abilities behind that??? It wasn’t welcome in Hitman, and it’s sure as not welcome here. If you’re going to nick an idea from another game, make sure it’s something good.

Negatives/bugs
- Once again, enemies have unfair AI: If a single enemy detects you, then everyone in the entire area instantly loses their ♥♥♥♥ and goes on alert. ♥♥♥♥ off
- If you’re spotted just a fraction of a second during the alert phase, everyone instantly knows exactly where you are! Double ♥♥♥♥ off
- They can also hit you accurately with automatic fire from over a whopping 500m away. Triple ♥♥♥♥ off
- Climbing is extremely hit and miss, with very obvious ledges within arm’s reach, but you’re unable to climb them because the game says so. Why the ♥♥♥♥ can’t my guy grab a ledge when it’s barely chest height?? Did enemies smear grease on half the very obvious climbable objects in this game or something???
- Movement feels very floaty: movement has a weird inertia, like you’re controlling a car or bowling ball, and leaping through the air questions whether this game takes place on planet Earth or not
- Some gun sights are misaligned
- No crouch slide
- Can’t aim low with weapon resting
- Can’t disable enemy tags
- CI Games STILL haven’t figured out how to code it so recoil affects your aim when you fire the first shot when using ADS (same like SGW3).
- The weapon wheel is clunky, and I often didn’t use my gadgets because of this. You’re telling me the average keyboard has around 100 buttons, yet I’m forced to use this stupid consolised weapon wheel to select my items???


Conclusion
Honestly, I prefer the previous SGW3. As a stand alone title, Contracts is still fun to play, but it’s honestly time CI Games start pumping resources into bug fixes, problematic AI and general gameplay improvements, as unfortunately CI Games are notorious for their “bad” games and whilst graphics have improved tenfold over the years, their gameplay is still behind the times. Also please stop with this obsession with snowy levels.

Summary
Ion Maide… sorry. Let me start again.

Ion Fury is THE BEST throwback to 90’s shooters to date. It’s so un-apologetically old-school it’s running on an engine from 2 decades ago. Good old, run-and-gun fun, traversing large intricate levels, hunting secrets and spouting cheesy one liners. It’s like we never left 1996.

How does Ion Fury compare to those “other” pretenders? Well, STRAFE is like eating week old pizza that fell behind the sofa, garnished with dust bunnies. DUSK is like a fine night out at a fancy restaurant. Ion Maiden is like having the king’s personal chef cook a 3-course meal for you on his private yacht, overlooking the sunset, and your massage starts in an hour.

- Highly recommended for gamers who grew up on FPS games in the 90’s (like me), or for those who want to know how a real 90’s shooter looks and plays

- Not recommended for people looking for an amazing story, or want something more than blasting the ♥♥♥♥ out of low-res sprites

Graphics
Before you ask, no this isn’t quite how games looked back then: Ion Maiden strikes a good balance between 90’s graphics and something more modern. The in-game textures and sprites are considerably more high-res than Build games of yesteryear... which is a good thing, also with smoother animations.

Contrary to what people believe, you can’t just whip something up in MSPaint in 5 minutes and mutter “b-b-but it’s retro.” No, back then developers tried to cram as much detailed as they could in those chunky pixels, and so is the case here. I felt like I had to point that out, as some “retro” games justify the use of lazy art design because they think it’s old-school. Rest assured, here each texture and sprite has been treated with care and really draws you into this little game world.

Music and Sound
This is true old school music. Not just in the way it sounds, but the type of melody and beats used. Fairly simplistic, nothing too bombastic, and definitely not ♥♥♥♥♥♥’ Mario 8-bit music (thank god). Here’s a developer who knows what retro music actually sounds like, and not stick in 8-bit tunes for the sake of “being retro.”

Sound effects are fairly good: weapons sound decent, the death screams of enemies are delightful to hear, although I’m not too fond of their repeating dialogue. I wouldn’t be surprised if “fan out” becomes a meme associated with this game. Also some sounds can overplay way too much simultaneously (which I understand is a problem with the Build engine).

The main character Shelly is also not shy of cheesy one liners, which aside from a few scripted sequences and retorts aimed at Heskel, aren’t very memorable nor hold a candle to Caleb, Duke or Mr. Wang. Still, she sounds pretty hot and it’s fairly entertaining when she makes a comment after glorious kills, plus knows how to swear without making it cringey.

Gameplay
You play Shelly “Bombshell” Harrison, the sole surviving member of a police force who goes after Heskel, some bad dude who enjoys talking a lot (no manic laughter sadly). Between you and him is his army of cyborgs, so you cleave a bloody path to said bad dude, pick up guns, keycards and kill bosses. Just like how it was in 1996. Retro.

Of course, anyone can with a bit of technical prowess can make a “retro” shooter, but fail to capture the spirit of what an ACTUAL retro shooter is: thankfully, Ion Fury remains 100% faithful to the time period, and playing it makes me feel like a little kid again blasting sprites in Doom and Duke Nukem, when I should have been frolicking outside like a normal child. The way the aiming is, the movement, enemies, level design… This is how it’s done!!

The guns are nothing special, with the main workhorse weapons being the revolver who’s alt. Fire can lock on multiple enemies for instant headshots, a shotgun/grenade launcher combo, an SMG that can be held akimbo that sets enemies on fire (it isn’t as interesting as it sounds) and what seems to be the mascot for the game, the bowling bomb that can home in on enemies. No rocket launcher, sadly. Having said that, the guns are fairly fun to use and the level architecture and enemy placement have inspired me to really to constantly be on the move and switch between different guns on the fly, which is how an old-school FPS SHOULD be played.

Enemies range from cannon-fodder cultists, to more dangerous types, like some teleporting skinless guy to large mechs, with a few trivial boss fights that really just require extreme amounts of lead than anything else. Enemies do pop in and out of cover sometimes and some can do tremendous amounts of damage, however the game isn’t too hard since you can carry up to 10 medkits that heal you instantly at the press of a button.

The action comes thick and fast in Ion Maiden and you’ll be bunny hopping around the environment, pulling snap-shots in mid air, spontaneously switching weapons, diving through windows and blasting innocent plants to death because they look like one of the cultists in the game. Aiming and movement are slick and smooth, without that sliding-feeling some old-school games are known for. I’ve also noticed that ducking at the last minute can result in enemies missing shots, which is something I don’t often see in shooting games.

The levels themselves feel fairly large, have alternate routes to flank enemies, feature some destruction and of course, tons of secrets, some of which will seriously have you racking your brains. The environments are fairly diverse, and truly showcase just what a (tweaked) 20 year old engine can pull off. Nearly all these areas feel lived in at some point, with interactables dotted around appropriate places such as a bar, complete with working vending machines, dart-boards and a bowling alley.

Negatives
2 things immediately come to mind: those ♥♥♥♥♥♥’ head crawly things + those ♥♥♥♥♥♥’ head flying things. Whether intentional or some sick joke, these bastards are annoying as they are hard to hit, have erratic movement patterns and with the crawling ones, usually hide in cramped areas. The absolute bane of video games. I wouldn’t be surprised someone makes a mod that removes these pricks.

Weapons themselves work extremely well, but aren’t particularly unique. They’re also extremely overpowered, especially the homing bombs and Ion bow. The damage model is fairly inconsistent: sometimes it can take a whopping 3 shots from a shotgun to down someone, other times a single blast to the chest does the trick.

Lastly enemies have a habit of appearing in rooms you’ve literally cleared a few seconds ago, although only triggered after acquiring a keycard so at least they’re predictable.

Only bug I’ve come across is that the lock on for the revolver sometimes fails to work and I’ve had very small performance drops. Aside from that, this is an extremely polished game that runs buttery smooth nearly the entire 12-16 hours of pixelated pleasure I’ve had.

Conclusion
As someone who grew up playing real old school shooters like Doom, Quake or Duke Nukem, it’s disappointing (and insulting) to see so many pretenders to the throne piss all over my dreams. Well, now with Ion Fury released we can now all cry happy tears together and blast the ♥♥♥♥ out of pixelated sprites, drink Um Bongo and watch Power Rangers. From now on, any puppy-eyed developer who wants to make a true old-school shooter needs to be strapped to a chair and forced to play Ion Fury from start to finish, Clockwork Orange style. This is how it’s done!

Ion Fury is an absolute blast to play, and right now sits at the throne of 90’s retro shooters. Yea I use the words “retro” and “old-school” like it’s going out of fashion, but with so many recent titles trying to claim the throne, no one does it like Ion Fury does, and it’s a reassuring hearty slap on the shoulder that old-school shooters are making a come-back.

Summary
A classic RPG adventure where you play a generic bald man on a revenge mission that will take you all over a beautiful island. Meet forest dwelling hippies, dastardly desert bandits, and machine-god worshipping cultists. Use swords, magic, arrows, guns, lasers... And kill dinosaurs!

Elex is janky with dated game mechanics. Elex is like that annoying relative who tries to be cool and hip but fails at it... but you still love them dearly and will attend their parties, just to eat their cake.

- Recommended for patient old-school RPGers + Gothic fans who need to pledge a minimum of 10 hours gameplay time just to get somewhere.

- Not recommended for casuals who require instant gratification. You will complain you can’t kill anything within 5 minutes, refund + leave a negative review saying “grafix sux 0/10.”

This review will try to cover the good and bad of Elex, so no fan-boyism here.

Graphics
I’m not sure where this notion comes from that every modern game HAS to sport top notch graphics. Elex isn’t next-gen, but that’s not to say the graphics are poor, far from it. Expect nice diverse environments, ranging from foresty biomes, sandy deserts, frozen wastes, volcanic ashlands and futuristic citadels, so exploring is an absolute pleasure. Special praise should also be given to how much verticality the environments spoils you with. Overall, the visuals are very gamey as opposed to hyper-realistic and runs like butter, which is great.

Another praise that needs mentioning is how alive Edan feels. Settlements have their own NPCs with areas of work, bars where they retire to and even their own sleeping quarters, be it their own house or mattress strewn across the floor. Likewise, abandoned town have rats scurrying across the floor, dinner plates still left out, and decomposed skeletons (both physically and metaphorically).

Character models and textures look decent enough, although there seems to be worryingly only a single female face model throughout the whole of Edan... I take it feminism isn’t a thing in Germany.

The UI is... basic, not attractive but gets the job done. It can be annoying trying to find that one particular item you desire and some icons look too similar. It could be worse, but it definitely can be better.

Music and Sound
The musical score is far from anything special, especially compared to previous PB titles. There’s lots going on, with different areas housing their own particular themes and motifs that really suit the area. Whilst I enjoyed the exploration music, the combat music is atrocious: it’s just far too upbeat and overbearing for the slow-paced and methodical combat the game offers.

The sound department seems a bit bipolar, with rain sound akin to a silent movie, loud footsteps, and hitting stuff with your sword sounding like someone’s just fallen through your roof. I’d strongly recommend separately changing the volume sliders for music, voice and effects, or modding the sound files as you see fit.

As for the voice acting which some people complain about, yes some of the characters sport voice acting as enthusiastic as a funeral director, which is tied in to the story. Problem? As for others, I found the voice acting very good. No complaints here.


Gameplay
Elex is your typical RPG: you got your main quest, side quests, enemies to kill, loot to loot, trading, levels and perks to gain. You can also craft certain items, gain companions and explore to your heart’s content. Enemies have fixed levelling so you truly get a sense of progression: however tougher, badder enemies will start to make their prescence known later on in the game.

You play Jax, the most generic white bald gravely-voiced man in video game history. You crash your shuttle, get betrayed by your brother and go on an epic revenge quest, befriending and annoying certain people along the way. So yea, no prizes for amazing story, but I play video games for gameplay and not to read Charles Dickens.

Right, everyone is up in arms about the combat, so let’s get it out the way. It rely's on timing and patience: you need to time each mouse click so it matches with a marked line in the combo meter. Time each strike right and you increase additional damage + unlock the ability to pull off a powerful move. Mistime it however, and you’re back to square one. Yes, it’s not the best system out there and is pretty arcadey. But in all honesty, when has a big named RPG EVER got the combat right? Wait, did you say how about spamming the roll button? *laughs in Tamerian*

Ranged combat is as basic as it gets. Point at monster, shoot at monster. Repeat until monster dies. It’s pretty bad but gets the job done. Sadly mobs are bullet sponges until you pump lots of points into dexterity and find some late-game unique weapons. Also what’s with the slow moving projectiles and weird bow aiming?

Playing, no... experiencing Elex is pretty much like being born again. From the get go, you're weak as soggy biscuits and basic chickens can kill you in a few pecks while all you can do is tickle them. Your early adventures will consist of losing, running away and being forced to partake on diplomatic quests before you’re even barely fit for combat.

You will travel cross the land, searching far and wide, and partaking on various quests from different factions. Some activities can alter the storyline (not by much) or how well you work with a faction, so think carefully about your actions should you wish to join one of the 3 groups on the island (if you want to, that is).

Elex is a heavy investment of time, swearing and quick-loading: it wasn't well until after 10 hours
before I could finally venture out into the world and feel like I can actually kill beginner enemies. 40 hours in and I was killing the most powerful enemies in the game with a handful of blows. Make no mistake, only through hard work WILL you succeed at this game. If that sort of stuff scares you, well… you know what sort of gamer you are.

Problems
The AI borders on insanely stupid, to cheap and godlike: unable to navigate around a tree, or one-shotting you in mid-air. Expect companions to casually observe you getting your arse spanked, shoot projectiles into walls, or bring half a dozen enemies on your tail whilst you’re peacefully picking flowers off the roadside.

You can dodge an enemy strike cleanly, only to still get hit by some invisible hit-detection, which is ♥♥♥♥♥♥’ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥!!

Movement is awkward, since it’s classic 3rd person it’s slightly delayed and there’s a bit of momentum that can throw you off, especially when you’re trying to land on a precarious ledge using the Jetpack.

Much of the information in the game is vague. Apparently, strength DOESN’T make your character stronger: rather, it allows him to weld better weaponary which alters his stats to make him stronger.

Also, why the ♥♥♥♥ is there no digits on the character page??? Come on, this is an RPG: I want to see my stats all in digits!! I want to see those numbers man, this is WHY I play an R-P-♥♥♥♥♥♥’-G!!!

Whilst 90% of the time the hand-crafted world is strong, other times it just leaves me scratching my head. Why do I put so much effort in cracking a high level safe, all for the sake of some scrap metal and 2 toilet rolls???

Conclusion
I really enjoyed the 100+ hours that Elex gave to me. Nope, the visuals aren’t amazing and the jank is real. What I did get however was a superbly hand crafted world for me to explore, different factions to mingle with, things to kill… and above all, a real old-school RPG at it’s heart.

What I'll say is this: Elex is unapologetically dated, and needs many hours in order to even begin to get somewhere. If you can get past this, prepare to explore a fantastic world that will draw you in like it’s 2002 all over again.

Failing that, just play Witcher 3 and roll all over the floor like a ♥♥♥♥♥♥’ pillock.

Serellan, yes you heard that right, THAT company who released Takedown: Red Sabre (a broken mess of a game) to the public are at it once again with their dirty tricks. And yes, I got fooled. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. I’m a bleedin’ prick.

I’m a prick for believing them, giving them a second chance and buying their game. And so are the other unfortunate souls who also brought their game. Sorry, but that’s the truth. Maybe we can make a Steam page called “Pricks who believed in Serellan” where we can cry virtual tears and repeatedly post that meme of someone drawn in MSPaint crying on someone’s shoulder.


Look, in all honesty there really is nothing to see here. A very very bare-bones prototype of a first person shooter, with decent graphics, but with extremely basic gameplay, bugs, awful sound. You walk around the single level, shoot bad guys, order your team to move somewhere, halt or follow your arse, rescue hostages and… that’s pretty much it.

Animations glitch out constantly, your team mates are about as useful as a sack of rocks, enemies can either miss an entire clip at point blank range, or shoot your eyelash off from halfway across the map.


How can I summarise this game?

Well, Epsilon is basically one of those “MyFirstShooter.exe” games you find on obscure Indie game forums written by some kid in DarkBasic or Game Maker, who inevitability ends up having the piss ripped out of him for producing such a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ game. He then goes on a forum rampage cursing everyone, abandons his game, changes his online identity and is pretty much never heard from again.

Epsilon is that game.

Summary
This modern reboot of Thief serves not only as a huge insult to the fan base: it’s the final nail in the coffin for this once legendary franchise.

As a Thief game, it’s bad… very VERY bad. As a stand-alone stealth title, it’s fairly poor, has extremely questionable design choices and ultimately offers more frustration then it does fun.

Nauseating level design, horribly linear levels, embarrassingly bad stealth and combat mechanics, cringe worthy dialogue…. This is the epiphany of horrible game design through and through.

Graphics are excellent though, that’s about it.

Not a good game, not the worst game either, but very boring to play. This is one for the history books on how to forever ruin a franchise.

Graphics
Let’s not get caught up too much in this current ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥: the graphics ARE stunning and atmospheric without a doubt, and is the game’s (only) best feature. Textures are sharp, the world is fairly detailed, characters look great, and as ever, the lighting and shadow really bring the environments to life and pull you into this drab world. When you step out into the open city and see the moon casting light rays behind a towering church in the background is just breathtaking.

With the addition of full body awareness, words cannot describe the feeling of watching your own 2 feet slowly inching along a narrow beam, whilst overlooking a guard patrol as their shadows dance across the wall opposite via a nearby torch. It’s moments like these that make you ♥♥♥♥ your pants and think “am I playing a game or doing this for real?”

I’m not sure why more FPS games don’t allow you to see your own body, as it not only helps immersion, it’s a strong indicator of how visible you are. Kudos to Thief for bringing this feature into modern gaming.

Music and Sound
The music is hit and miss. The main menu has some Batman theme going on (what is it about this game and Batman?). In game it’s ok, very subtle thankfully… until you get spotted, then it’s your typical trumpets-up-your-arse orchestral/dubstep modern developers seem to love. Do yourself a favour and switch that ♥♥♥♥ off.
Sound effects are decent. Good enough to draw you into this game world.
Gameplay
This is where Thief just falls flat on it’s face, gets up, then somehow slips on it’s arse.

First up, the level design = horrendous. Whoever designed these levels is a bare basic amateur at best, and that’s not an insult: it’s a FACT.

Let’s start with the “free-roam” city hub that you’ll spend most of your time in: it’s ABYSMAL. It’s a horrible maze like environment full of dead ends that’s a nightmare to navigate. The in-game map is an atrocious mess, looks like some pixel-art “artist” ate a bunch of Lego, vomited it in a bucket and said that’s concept art for a new Tetris game. The map will tell you an entrance is some here, however when you actually get there in game, the gate is bloody locked and the only way through is AROUND some obscure alleyway you passed 5 minutes ago.

Seriously, ♥♥♥♥ this city hub, give me the noclip cheat and let me be on my way!!! it’s more easier to traverse the horribly linear missions than this excuse for this faux free-roam area.

Speaking of missions, yes, they’re linear. Well, you are given SOME choice… like, enter this room from the door on the right, or the door on the left. Yea, you get those sort of options. Sometimes. This is like Half-Life linear. Go to A to B. OK, I may be lying. Occasionally, you’ll get something like a beam to walk across, or boxes to hide behind. Again, it literally is only a beam OR only boxes: it’s clear the level designer WANTS you to take this path, pat himself on the back and say “hey, this is stealth gameplay!”

How can you build on the original game yet exclude one of the most defining aspects? Where are the vents, the sewer systems, open windows and freedom we were spoiled with in the original game?? The 1998 masterpiece was way ahead of it’s time, yet fast forward to 2014 and we seem to have gone back to PS1 era level design.

Again, Thief has a bipolar identity as a stealth title and a collectathon. I mean, how can this qualify as a true stealth title when all the “houses” (rather single or double rooms) you break into whilst in the city hub are completely devoid of life? Where’s the thrill of being a master thief if all you ever do is break into empty establishments collecting trinkets without fear of getting caught? Doesn’t help that whenever you break into a house, you have to spam x to open. EVERY. SINGLE. ♥♥♥♥♥♥’. TIME. It’s such a horrible game mechanic I actually avoided looting houses just to save my fingers from getting Repetitive Strain Injury.

Thief has some serious balancing issues. Mr. Garrett must regularly compete as an Olympic athlete as he’s able to outrun his opponents 20 yards away before they’ve even drawn their swords, eliminating any challenge. There’s an option to reduce run speed, which permanently handicaps Garrett to a casual jog, like he’s an obese man with Asthma trying to run out of the supermarket with 2 stolen crates of pork pies on each shoulder. It’s either one or the other extreme, sadly, which doesn’t correct the issue at all.

The combat is so bad, it’s hilarious! No, seriously! Should you go toe to toe with an enemy, you can press a button to lower your body a few inches, resulting in them missing completely and allowing you a free one-hit KO. Trouble is, you can duck infinitely, resulting in a comedic battle sequence where not a single guard in this world realises he can go for the ankles and ruin your day forever. You ever seen those cartoons where 2 people are swinging at each other, constantly ducking yet never hitting each other? ♥♥♥♥♥♥’ hysterical!!!

What’s up with the UI? Those HUD icons look like they’re from some Early Access ♥♥♥♥♥.

Rope arrows that can only be used it specific spots?? Now you’re taking the piss.

No jump button. Do I even need to talk about this? Why the ♥♥♥♥ do I need to run around a table like a Loony Toons character instead of jumping over it like my life depends on it? (PS. Contextual jump don’t count).

As for Batman, sorry, Garrett himself, they did a decent job with the voice actor who sounds like a good Stephen Russell knock-off: pity the script is terrible and cringeworthy. And his character design is a joke. Looks like some hybrid Ninja/Batman cosplayer with that ridiculous oversized cape of his. What’s with the mascara and general emo look? Speaking of characters, all of them in the game are bratty, annoying and forgettable.

Something to note is that when you interact with the environment (taking loot, opening doors, etc) you’ll witness yourself performing said action with your very own hands. Immersive? Yes. Time consuming? After the 99th time, yes.

What’s good about the gameplay? Well, you get a swoop mechanic that let’s you dart out of the darkness to snatch some trinkets, then just as quickly slink back to the shadows without a sound. This feature is brilliant and I’m very surprised most stealth games haven’t adopted this approach, as it makes logical sense and is balanced thanks to it’s limited use. Spinter Cell’s ♥♥♥♥♥♥ rolly-polly can’t touch this.

Conclusion
Here's the best advice I can give on getting the most out of Thief 2014:
- Trying to hide the game from your Steam library and friends is a much more enjoyable stealth experience than this sneaky lump of turd.
- Going to the Looking Glass Thief forum and announcing your love for the 2014 game and saying the old one is ♥♥♥♥ is a more thrilling combat experience than this piece of crap can offer.
-Breaking into a video game shop at night, opening all the Thief game cases and putting a piece of paper saying “this game is ♥♥♥♥” in each one before being arrested is a more realistic scenario than this watered down modernised quick timed event cash-grab remake of a post 90s classic. RIP Thief 1998: your adopted 2014 brother is a lie.

Summary
The review section, oh dear. Definitely not the game of 2017, but this is far, FAR from the disaster people make it out to be. An extremely fun, challenging and rewarding game that I thoroughly enjoyed more than I should have.

Unlock, upgrade and customise your gear to set out and traverse extremely large expansive maps. Snipe enemies from afar, infiltrate secret bases, or use all out action to complete your objectives from any angle at any time.

If you aren't swayed by public opinions plus enjoy flawed yet fun games, snap this one up. For COD fanboys and people who enjoy AAA chores, sorry this isn't for you.

I'm Going In
Who remembers the underrated IGI games? Being a big fan of both, SGW3 feels like a true spiritual successor, so this title already tickles my pickle. For those unfamiliar with IGI, imagine a more condensed and realistic version of the Far Cry series without all the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.

Let's get this out the way: the game description says "modern military shooter". So no animal hunting, side activities or other such Ubishite nonsense: this is a modern military shooter as mentioned in the description. Want to chase checkpoints or skin animals, go play Far Cry instead: let's not down vote a game because you can't tell oranges from apples.

Graphics
Been reading people slating the game for having "last gen graphics, bad graphics", etc. You know the doctor was right, doing it too much leads to blurry vision.

Seriously, the game looks gorgeous. Expect to visit many varied locations, from desolate forests, train yards, abandoned apartment blocks plus thankfully sparse appearances of underground labyrinths. The scope (no pun intended) of each level is massive, it's just a shame the draw distance falls short of around 1km.

Texture work is excellent, characters look great and the weapons look phenomenal. Top everything off with an adjustable day and night cycle just sweetens the visual package.

Music and Sound
Aside from the strangely appealing menu music, the soundtrack is fairly minimal. Which is a plus, as I want to be able to hear the enemy’s footsteps and farts in this game, not some artificial orchestral or trumpets blowing up my arse. The soundtrack has been done with intentional restraint, so kudos to CI Games for that.

Many of the guns themselves sound great, echoing plus reverb depending on what environments you’re in, whether you're in a dank tunnel or nestled on top of a hill. Surround sound is done fairly well, and you can often pinpoint enemy locations by the sound of their footsteps alone.

Ambient sounds are decent but tend to cut out completely just by going indoors or in a vehicle (even your buggy). Some interiors are virtually silent and kill the otherwise immersive audio.

Now we come to the dialogue, which seems to get on everyone’s tits. Yes, it’s not good, but it’s not bad either. It’s just people talking about go here, kill this, steal that. Sure, it’s not going to get an Oscar and there are some very cringe worthy lines, but did you really expect gun welding stone cold mercenaries to perform bleedin’ Shakespeare? No, I didn’t think so.

Gameplay
The game is somewhat semi-open world, allowing you to freely explore the landscape, perform tasks at your leisure or just explore and cause general havoc upon the residents of Georgia.

You get to choose from a varied arsenal of juicy firearms, all boasting individual stats and modelled to perfection. Each weapon can be customised to a varying degree and whilst you are spoiled for choice, the weapon balancing is pretty poor.

I say this because as you unlock weapons in the game, your next gun might perform worst than the previous one, which makes no sense at all! Plus whilst I'm no firearm expert, I was under the impression that a .45 calibre handgun generally causes more damage than a 9mm one, no?

Moving swiftly onto the meat of the game, upon receiving an objective (or not) you head to a location, sneak to various high vantage points generously dotted around the landscape (as enemies love building secret bases below precarious sniping spots) and grin with glee just thinking about all the different routes you can take.

You can use your cute little aerial drone to scout for enemy positions, secret routes and all that jazz. Once you've figured out the lay of the land, you can either start sniping fools, sneak in close for some wet works, or shoot your way through.

As the title suggests, sniping has been given the strongest focus. Since the game features bullet drop and wind speed, you'll have to adjust your scope accordingly to compensate, and there really is something immersive watching your character manually tune his scope click by click. I've found the in-game ballistics to be extremely consistent and missed shots were always because I messed up. The sniping never cheated or trolled me, unlike in Sniper Elite. Finally, sniping done right!

Once you're done picking off snipers and sentries, you can attempt to sneak into the base, hack into CCTV cameras and interrogate enemies for information. The stealth in the game won't rival that of something like Splinter Cell, but it's fairly enjoyable and not too hardcore. Lights can be shot out to cover your approach, stones thrown to distract overly curious guards, and you can climb most buildings and cliff edges... sometimes. Overall, I've found this method of gameplay to be the most enjoyable and brings me back to the days of playing IGI.

So onto the shooting... yea. The standard combat falls short and has been done much better in other FPS games. Assault rifles have the strangest recoil that I've never been able to adapt to, and there isn't much sense in taking anything other than an AK-47 as 99% of the bastards in the game carry one, and NATO ammo is rarer than rocking ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. Least the enemies aren't bullet sponges.

The AI is somewhat competent: they take cover, flank you and call for backup. They do stupid things sometimes like climbing up ladders one at a time right into your crosshairs, but asides from that they are a challenging force to be reckoned with, at least on hardest difficulty.

Bugs
I’ve fallen through the world a few times, climbing isn't 100% smooth, and the AI can be nearly godlike: if you miss a single shot, god have mercy on your soul as they’ll all instantly drop their ♥♥♥♥ to start accurately firing on your position 200m away and raining mortars on your head.

Enemies disappearing beyond 300m is just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ for a sniping game and seriously needs to be fixed, there's no questions about that.

With reports of long loading times, I'm happy to report that first loading takes 20-45 secs on my rig, with subsequent loadings taking mere seconds. Furthermore, the game runs smoothly at around 50-70fps. Obviously, your mileage may vary depending on your specs, so be warned.

Conclusion
SGW3 is far from perfect, and at worst an above average experience. Personally, I believe all the issues with the game have been blown WAY out of proportion. Sadly thanks to us gamers in general, nothing says "I'm edgy" more than joining in on the latest game-hating bandwagon, which sadly SGW3 fell into. This is why we can’t have nice things in the world.

For me, I enjoy SGW3 for being a focused military shooter with no stupid distractions. I enjoy choosing an enemy outpost and either sniping, sneaking or shooting my way into there, regardless if there's an objective or not.

Take this from me: if you’re a mature PC gamer who knows what this game is about and can forgive the rough edges, you’re in for a brilliant time. For everyone else, leave this one and go back to your “AAA” open-world collectathons.

Now if you excuse me, I’m off to have fun and snipe some fools.

Summary
When STRAFE first launched, it initially marketed itself as an old-school FPS with rogue-like elements, yet sadly missed the mark by a long shot, sidestepped off a ledge and got -20 frags on Q3DM17. Like Marmite, you either love it or hate it, and sadly STRAFE garnered mix reviews amongst gamers, and I myself gave it a negative review.

However after listening to critique, bug hunting and implementing some essential features, STRAFE has grown to become a fierce contender for the old-school shooter, *sorry*, a rogue-like Crown with old-school shooter elements.

A fairly decent game where you shoot droves of mindless monsters in somewhat randomly procedurally generated levels. Upgrade your gun and character along the way and try not to die: you only have a single life. STRAFE is a fun but repetitive shooter that's great in short bursts.

Graphics
If you're allergic to pixel-art games like me, than I'm here to reassure you that this game is definitely NOT one of them and looks more like a 1998 shooter running in Software mode. Yes, it screams “look at my blocky graphics, I'm retro”, but don't reach for your sick bag yet: STRAFE actually looks decent and playable without inducing headaches that pixel-art games give you by default. There's also a good variety of colour palettes, so you're not just looking at 50 shades of brown.

Music and Sound
If STRAFE had to choose one selling point above anything else, it would be the soundtrack. The music gives the game a unique personality and works extremely well with the flow of action and suspense, without becoming too overbearing. It definitely harks to something from the classic days of pre-2000 FPS games and thank god they didn't say to themselves “hey we're retro, lets use 8-bit chiptunes”. This is proper retro-style music done right, not a ♥♥♥♥♥♥' Gameboy soundtrack. Great job by ToyTree!!

As for the sound effects itself, it's pretty decent without becoming too overbearing for the senses. After all, you're holding the fire button down 90% of the time and it serves to have a gun that still sounds good after round 953 and not sound like a Howitzer cannon going off in your ear. Directional sounds seems a little off however which is essential for a game like this, so hopefully they can fix that.

Gameplay
Upon starting a new game (nice Doom reference btw) you're given the choice of either a shotgun, machinegun and rail gun. After you've chosen your favourite weapon of mass destruction, it's time to go kill things. And kill you will.

Within 5 seconds or so you can already start blasting fools away and literally let the blood flow, and thanks to STRAFE's responsive and slick movement and mouse controls, you'll have no trouble bunny hopping, side strafing and landing that perfect headshot whilst leaping over a crowd of enemies. STRAFE really hits the nail on the head when it comes to controls and is an extreme joy to experience and should be applauded. Finally, an old-school wannabe that gets the controls spot on.

Asides from controls, STRAFE really nails the sense of progression, as you initially start out very weak and unable to tackle a handful of enemies, then slowly and noticeably turn into a walking tank near the end of the game. Yet even with a vastly upgraded gun and decked out character, a few mistakes is all it takes to end your single life and force you to restart your game, still keeping you on your toes whilst letting you enjoy the power trip.

Throughout your adventures, you can pick up extra guns, ammo, armour and health, all of which aren't too common so you better "git gud" as kids these days like to say. Along the way be sure to pick up scrap and credits from certain boxes and slain foes, for these are used to purchase supplies or even perks from designated shops, such as double jumping or extra shields. If you're lucky, you may even come across special vendors that can drastically alter the properties your weapon, turning your primary peashooter of choice into something much more formidable.

And to spice things up, each level is randomly generated.

Ah yes, the RNG rogue-like aspects of the game, how could I forget. Let's not reach for the pitchforks just yet: it's actually done well for once. Each play-through is fairly different from the last and with a variety of open areas from claustrophobic space stations to more open arena-style canyons, you never quite know what's round the corner forcing you to change your playstyle on the fly, which helps alleviate the otherwise repetitive nature of the game. As mentioned, pick-ups are rare and vendors even rarer, giving a nice sense of reward after having to survive lengthy battles.

Millenium Update
It seemed STRAFE was born without testicles and missing a right lung, as at launch you couldn't save nor could you switch weapons via hotkeys, which in my book is the ultimate sin of gaming. These 2 features were my beef with the game and since they've been added, it's literally been an absolute gamechanger!

You can now save your game at cryo-chambers, which is handy, though they fail to exist in the later stages of the game. On another note, your save file gets deleted if you resume where you last left and quit the game again, unless you find another terminal. It's clear as daylight that saving was a rushed afterthought, although it's better than having no saves at all.

Before, you had to use the scroll-wheel to slowly switch between guns, which was extremely clunky in combat and by time you've chosen a particular weapon for crowd control, you're already up to your bollocks in enemies. Thankfully now at the press of a button you can switch between all your weapons and back again like, you know, every single bloody shooter out there.

Still, the weapon categories are messed up, I mean why does the shotgun and the gauss gun take up the same slot, and the rapid-fire plasma cannon the same as the rocket launcher? How about explosive weapons for one category, rapid-fire guns in another, etc. Like I said, an afterthought that was provided many months after release, but I suppose beggars can't be picky.

The game is much more balanced now: enemies are less bullet-spongy and are evenly distributed throughout each level, making the game much less of a chore and much more fun.

Checking your map or inventory is extremely disorientating, as your character will shift his view either side of the screen in a really nauseating way. Yea, I get it, it's cool and edgy, but I can't see nowt in front of me and now I hardly ever look at the map to prevent myself from hurling all over my keyboard. Why not just have a map overlay that pops up on your screen like, I dunno, 99% of other similar games?? Not like you'll need to use it: the map overlay is as useless as ever.

Some issues still remain: I had to restart a playthrough because there was absolutely no way to progress, enemies often get stuck in walls (especially during the Canyons section) and I got briefly stuck in a wall at one point. Having said that, STRAFE has improved drastically since it's first iteration.

Conclusion
You really have to give credit to Pixel Titans for not abandoning their game, listening to player feedback and constantly working on STRAFE and turning it into a substantial game that's a blast to play. In this day and age of cash-grabbing developers releasing half-baked Unity-based cookie cutter ♥♥♥♥♥, it's fantastic to see a developer pour love into their title when they could have said “sod it we have the £££” and left it at that. Well done, Pixel Titans!!

So yea, my negative review has now turned into a positive one. Look, STRAFE won't blow your socks off. But if you're staring at the 11009 games in your Steam library and complain you have nothing to play, then STRAFE is that perfect in-between title to fire up, forget about and go back to again.