Lord Wang
Texas red
Patrolling the mojave almost makes me wish for a nuclear winter.

Currently Offline
Last Online 9 hrs, 34 mins ago
1 VAC ban on record | Info
390 day(s) since last ban
Favorite Game
new game i am addicted to: FNV
favorite radio song in FNV: Big Iron
Favorite song: Rock Me, amadeus: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LY-W4nUTtZI

The day of September 31st, I was home alone, watching Shrek. I heard a ring at the doorbell, and walked over. Looking out the door, I saw a car driving away, and a small package sitting on the doorstep. Curious, I brought it inside and unwrapped it. It was a case with “Jacob Slendtorius” written on it in Comic Sans. Confused, I scratched my head and pulled out the case. I opened it up, and inside was a CD. I placed the CD in my CD player and white noise played. I heard scratching at my window, and as I approached, the noise on the CD got louder, and so did the scratching. My heart was racing. Faint noises of breath hitting a microphone sounded from the CD. I listened closer - it was Jacob Sartorius’s distorted mixtape. The sound of autotune echoed in the background. Suddenly, from my window, I saw a beanied, gnome-like figure, the stench of popcorn singeing my nose. Behind him was a tall, dark figure wearing a sweatshirt and bearing the most hideous of braces. The mixtape, the gnome figure, the scratching - I knew it could be only one thing. It was Jacob Slendtorius - I thought he was just an urban legend, but the hideous beast was standing mere meters away from me. “WHAT IS UP DRAMALERTNATION, LET’S GET ROIIIIGHT INTO THE NEWS,” the gnome whispered. I screamed, and my ears began to bleed. The taller figure - the one I had now recognized to be Jacob Slendtorius, slowly walked forward. Frantically, I pulled up the YouTube app on my phone and disliked all of his videos and unsubscribed. The Slendtorius approached me slowly and awkwardly, now only feet away. In a raspy, pre-pubescent, autotuned voice, with a menacing chuckle and intrusive grin, he told me that I could wear his sweatshirt. “I don’t want to, please, leave me alone.” I replied. His grin dropped and his face went blank. He came closer, making me increasingly uncomfortable. He warned me that if I do not post this on Reddit, I will be forced to listen to his mixtape for the rest of my life, and he will make me “wear his sweatshirt.” The Slendtorius left seven lyric pages and self-advertisements and promotions on the ground, and forced me to hide them in the forest. He vanished into the night, along with his smaller gnome figure. I took the god-forsaken CD, and attempted to break it - but it wouldn’t crack. Hammered it, scratched it, threw it, sat on it, digested it - but it wouldn’t break. I put it in the CD player once more, and it was a message from the Slendtorius. “You must share this CD, give it to an unsuspecting person, and do not mention me. You will otherwise be forever cursed, just like this CD.” I put it in the mail to a random address, and my life has been normal ever since. I had my phone on me at the time, and was able to take a few pictures for proof. I took pictures of the CD case, the silhouette of the Slendtorius at my window, and a few other pictures that ended up being corrupted. These are those images: http://imgur.com/a/14UhC http://imgur.com/a/mg864

Recent Activity

1.8 hrs on record
last played on May 27
97 hrs on record
last played on May 27
602 hrs on record
last played on May 27
GraveDiGGers Sep 4, 2016 @ 11:03am 
oh shit waddup it's dat boi
Deerp Jul 31, 2016 @ 2:03pm 
░░░░░░▐▌▀▄▀▄▀▐▄SPOOKY SKILENTON
hey you
GraveDiGGers Jun 30, 2016 @ 8:14pm 
hey, sorry I saw your profile and I just thought you looked cute in your picture, I really wanted to tell you that)) It's really rare to see girls playing video games haha! I don't know why its a guy thing honestly im like really against misogyny and like ill be the one in the kitchen making sandwiches. We should really play l4d2 sometime its a really cool zombie game with a lot of scary moments, but don't worry ill be there to protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirting I swear Im just trying to be friendly I really like your profile picture sorry was that too far? Really sorry i'm really shy I don't go out much haha add me on skype we should talk more you look really nice and fun xxx