Happy New Year, cuz! My New Year's resolution is to convince myself I'm not having an early-midlife crisis by mulling around the idea of buying an actual Sega Genesis and reliving my childhood five minutes at a time because ♥♥♥♥ this 3 lives no continues wtf????

Yo yo yo, I heard Sega is bringing back Dreamcast memory cards because millennials want the chance to raise Sonic Adventure eggs. Of course, the programmers are going to have to make some changes because the gender function was programmed in binary HEYOO!

Hope you're doing well and may the loot boxes bring great fortune upon ye!

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That's right, 'cos! It's 2017 and it's looking like this degree in political surrealist art will finally pay off! Hope your 2016 went better than everyone else's and that 2017 has a lotta good gaming in store for us. Like Bad Dudes 2: Ninja's For Hire (cuz the president-kidnapping business is tough these days...)

Hey cuz! Good to hear from ya. Hope 2015 was good for you, too. 2016 will be the year we receive the Blessings of Akatosh in VR for some STUPID cash, apparently!

Hey cuz, hope you had a good holiday season. Here's to a whole new year of griefing noobs and telling them all the different ways you're going to have their mum!