WE'RE ON 80'S MTV LOL
MILITARY RANK + 80'S POP SINGER NAME = PARTY LIKE IT'S 1999
I know what you're thinking...and it's true. Change your name and you'll be joining the party so rockin' that it'll blow the poodle-perm right-off your head!
Ok, maybe you don't have to change your name. I love you.