Master Betty: Hmmm. I'll kill him. I'll kill him dead. Like with, with a, rock or something. Like a, like a stone.

Master Betty: I have been called bad before. Many have said I do things that are not correct to do. I don't believe in talk such as this. I am nice man, with happy feelings. All of the time. First, a joke. What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord?
[pause]
Master Betty: My ass. Nyah, haha, haha, haha, ENOUGH.

Wimp Lo: I see the way you look at him. I'm a man, too, you know? I go pee pee standing up.

Master Betty: Shirt ripper.

Wimp Lo: I rock. And roll. All day long. Sweet Suzy.

Ling: But Chosen One, I'd like to help you, but I, I, I, I, I , I, I just can't. I won't! WEE-OOH, WEE-OOH!

Chosen One: He wasn't at the restaurant, do you know where he is?

Ling: No, I won't tell. Stay, stay and live, live a life with me. WEE-OOH!

Chosen One: Look Ling, those curly Qs in your hair make me so hot I can't think straight!

Ling: You'll never make it. Never make it. Never make it. Never make it, never. Don't you see you can't make it?

[Chosen One grabs her shoulders and is clearly yelling]
Chosen One: [calmly] I implore you to reconsider.
Ling: Hmmmmm, OK.

Mayor: That tiny net was sure-fire master!
Master Betty: Yes, a tiny net is a death sentence, it's a net and it's tiny!

Master Betty: Orson!
Henchman: Welles.

Master Tang: [Master Tang walking and singing] Hmm, chicken go cluck-cluck, cow go moo. Piggy go oink-oink, how bout you? Wanna be an animal just like you.
[breaks off and looks around]
Henchman: [in bushes] Cuckoo! Cuckoo!
Master Betty: Mmm, I'm just a birdie, too!
Master Tang: [resumes singing] Lemur go pff-pff, Ostrich go baah. Koala go
Master Tang: [makes clicking noises]
Master Tang: [spins to face Betty]

Chosen One: I... will... not... be stopped... by a tiny little net.
[film starts running in reverse]
Chosen One: Just reverse the capture method, and yeah! I'm free!

Wimp Lo: Who is that?
[indicates chosen]
Student: [mouths for a few seconds] I don't know.

Chosen One: [after finding Dog dying] It's going to be OK, boy!
[dog rasps and dies]
Chosen One: Not, it's not!

Whoa: Do it for your family, and so I can be in the sequel!

Mu Shu Fasa: Stars above, aliens, was I right or what? Oh, you have to open your mouth.

Chosen One: I'll take a pound of nuts.
Shop Keeper: [yelling] That's a lot of nuts!

That'll be four bucks, baby! You want fries with that?
Master Tang: I know you seek The Chosen One. And I know what you did to his family.
[begins coughing]
Master Tang: And now, I'm going to beat you up.
Master Betty: Do you need a glass of water, or something? Geez, at least cover your mouth. We're all going to catch it.

Ling: Please, stop. Wimp Lo sucks as a fighter, a child could beat him.
Chosen One: Well, I'm gonna count to three, and if I hear one more friggin' squeak, I'm gonna take his shoes, and shove em' up his...

Master Betty: I am a great magician - your clothes are red!

Town Children: We're children. We're children.

Chosen One: Killing is wrong. And bad. There should be a new, stronger word for killing. Like badwrong, or badong. Yes, killing is badong. From this moment, I will stand for the opposite of killing: gnodab.