Recent reviews by Trainwiz

Finally, someone made a game about my life.

One of the few works in the past 73 years to melt the cold, black, unfeeling model train that sits in place of my heart. The sheer breadth and variety of content is what I was looking for in a game, on top of a story that was compelling enough for me to want to actually play and beat it.

It's 3AM. The peaceful hive of Bugtopolis mills about, content with their buggy lives, but it won't last. Soon, I descend upon them, running forty miles an hour and launching depleted uranium rounds which tear through their spawners and children like depleted uranium rounds through small bugs. Mushroom clouds blossom overhead as the various warheads I've launched make contact. At 4AM, it is over. Any survivors cannot rebuild: the ground is salted with nuclear fire and a swarm of robots have already descended upon the ruins of their city, like anti-locusts there to do nothing but build conveyor belts.

Behind me the planet is a twisted mess of railroads and walls. Irradiated powerpoles dot the landscape that I have ravaged, and any tree that dares violate my perfect mechanical world is quickly annihilated in a flurry of robots. The thousands of years of bug culture is gone, and here and there lone tribes scavenge for a pool of water that isn' filthy, or a blade of grass that isn't copper-coated. But they won't last long. Eventually the last bug will die, sobbing on the last island of nature in a sea of concrete and steam, and I will have my victory.

Mofos shouldn't have touched my radar.

My brother and I broke into a NASA engineering research lab just to play it on their big projector. Five men died trying to stop us.
But darned if it wasn't worth it.

I thought I was gonna get a game where I shot at things in a cave. But now I've just stolen a robot's panties after having sex with a rabbit.

Amazing game, story, characters, gameplay, and graphics are stunning, almost bioware level good. A+ 10/10

Imagine a game with incredible depth, unprecedented writing and an engrossing world.
This is not that game. However you can shout at dragons and marry lizards, so get it anyways.