Kil the *Ornaments*
We are the Gnome Demolition Team. You are the Non. You must learn to fear the *Gnome*.
Shivering in a pool of acid sweat, the Gnome awakens. His pointed hat, his *fat* body, and his disgusting facial 'hair' dripping with pespiration. This sweat was not produced by him, mind you, but a parasitic mass of hair barely worthy of the word "beard". He wakes, sees a convenience store, and runs for the door. He slams into the glass: his putrid, greased face slaps the door window, and he begins to slam the door with his gummi bear arms. A block away, the fleshy thuds calls the attention of 14 more of these un-sentient beings. Now 15 of these wastes of flesh were blubbering and flopping all over the sliding doors.
The store owner came out of his office, confused by the unnatural noises no man would ever want to make. He saw 15 Gnomes, abnormal buttocks flapping oh-so-unaturally in the sunlight, in the wind of their fellow comrades. He gasped and farted simultaniously. He locked the door, barricaded it, burped it, and changed its diaper.
Once he had finished burning his key in the furnace. He began to flee through the back door, and pleaded for help... but as soon as he said "Gnome" a person who had answered his calls instantly shriviled up into something resembling a... "AARRGGGHHHHH". The store owner panicked, thinking "NO! IM CONTAIGUS" He ran off, but was seen by Gnomes that had made their nest in a homeless man's untame beard, and almost died.
This is what we fight against.