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ARMA 2: Free


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Gameplay Stats
Member since:
January 30, 2010
Steam Rating:
10
Playing time:
37.1 hrs past 2 weeks
Garry's Mod
25.2 hrs / 1,351.4 hrs
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Grand Theft Auto IV
8.3 hrs / 35.0 hrs
PAYDAY: The Heist
1.4 hrs / 4.9 hrs
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S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl
1.3 hrs / 13.1 hrs
Team Fortress 2
0.7 hrs / 73.2 hrs
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Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
0.3 hrs / 0.3 hrs
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SovietWaffles

Profile _

OFWGKTA

Gazojak, Dashoguz, Turkmenistan 

One fish Two fish, Red fish Blue fish, Nic Nac paddy whack give the duck a stick.

Sometimes when I'm alone and I can't sleep at night, I get naked, rub vasoline all over my body and pretend I'm a slug in the kitchen.

My sphinkter is made of steel.



In the immortal words of Billy Madison
"If the dog is lost don't just sit on the porch like a goon, get your ass up and find the fucking dog!"


I know you all are very caring people:

I am a very sick boy little boy. My mother is typing this for me,
because I can't. She is crying. Don't cry, Mommy! Mommy is always sad,
but she says it's not my fault. I asked her if it was God's fault, but
she didn't answer, and only started crying harder, so I don't ask her
that anymore.

The reason she is so sad is that I'm so sick. I was born without a body.

It doesn't hurt, except when I go to sleep. The doctors gave me an
artificial body. My body is a burlap bag filled with leaves. The
doctors said that was the best they could do on account of us havin'
no money or insurance. I would like to have a body transplant, but we
need more money.

Mommy doesn't work because she said employers don't hire crying
people. I said, "Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged my burlap body.
Mommy always gives me hugs, even though she's allergic to burlap, and
it chafes her real bad. I hope you will help me. You can help me if
you forward this e-mail.

Dr. Van Nostrem from the clinic said if you forward this e-mail then
Bill Gates will team up with AOL and do a survey with NASA. Then the
astronauts will collect prayers from school children all over America
and take them up to space so that the angels can hear them better.
Then they will go to the Pope, and he will take up a collection in
church and send the money to the doctors. The doctors could help me
better then. Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball. Or maybe
just use my lungs and heart, when the doctors make them. The doctors
said that every time you forward this letter, the astronauts can take
another prayer to the angels.

Please help me. Mommy is so sad, and I want a body. I don't want my
leaves to rot before I turn 10. If you don't forward this e-mail,
that's OK. Mommy says you're a mean heartless shithead who doesn't
care about a poor little boy with only a head. She says that if you
don't stew in the raw pit of your own guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes
you die a long slow horrible death so you can burn forever in
hell. What kind of goddamned person are you that you can't take five
fucking minutes to forward this to all your friends so that they can
feel guilt and shame for the rest of their day, and then maybe help a
poor, bodiless nine-year-old boy?

Please help me! This really sucks. I try to be happy but it's hard.

I wish I had a puppy. I wish I could hold a puppy.

Thank You.
Billy 'Smiles' Evans,
the boy with just a head.
And a burlap sack for a body.


13 Comments - view all
< >
panduhh(: May 18, 2012 @ 8:33pm 
oh hey sovie..t. ahaha okay?
Soko#Dovah Bear Apr 22, 2012 @ 12:51pm 
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I LIKE THIS PROFILE
Soko#Dovah Bear Apr 8, 2012 @ 1:44am 
❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤
Post this on the walls of the 12 prettiest Girls you know...
If you get back 5 you're beautiful. ..
❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤
Soko#Dovah Bear Mar 31, 2012 @ 11:16am 
I think Sokos ban should be permadent because most likely he will continue greifing around BSG servers like he always has. Doctor's ban too, he is an ally of Soko in every way.
Soko#Dovah Bear Mar 25, 2012 @ 10:22pm 
8==========D get on my level
Soko#Dovah Bear Feb 20, 2012 @ 6:49pm 
This is a pro niggaright hurrrr

Groups _
Innovation Gaming (I-G)
209 Members  |  23 In-Game  |  70 Online  |  0 In Group Chat

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New York City - Public
155 Members  |  2 In-Game  |  25 Online  |  0 In Group Chat

Imperial_Community - Public
217 Members  |  24 In-Game  |  66 Online  |  0 In Group Chat


Games recommended by SovietWaffles _

Cheap and pretty fun definatly a reccomendation

Leave a comment August 9th, 2011 @ 6:25pm