Cones for all

Rule Number One: If someone rolls a nice joint, it's good to give the person a compliment on their rolling skills. Something like, "Thats some tight shit, buddy!"

Rule Number 2: Always remember to thank the person who has gotten you high. Unless it was really killer weed, in which case it is perfectly acceptable to forget to say thank you

Rule Number C: Never make your smoke out to be better than it really is. This gets everybody's hopes up just to be let down. Don't go bragging about how you got the Chronic, and then whip out the Down Town Brown on everyone's ass! People hate that. Especially us.

Rule Number 14: It is very impolite to hand someone an empty bowl without notifying that person of its potential emptyosity. A proper warning would be, Here ya go... I think it might be cashed. Go ahead give it a try, see what happens. We're all pulling for you. Good Luck."

Rule Number Seven: When rolling a joint, don't ever pack a seed. Instead, pack a lunch. It will come in very handy later. Make sure you pack enough to share.

Rule Number 8: You have to allot at least seven and three-quarters minutes of fake interest in the person supplying the weed. Say something nice about them or stuff, like, "Cool pipe," or, "Wow, that's a neat lizard."

Rule Number 9: I'm glad your cousin works in a movie theater and let you sit in the projection room once when you were visiting him in Phoenix last summer... but what you should really do is take a hit and pass the pipe already.

Rule Number 10: If you're getting high with someone and they ask for a sip of your drink, you must give them some. Dry mouth is not fucking funny. In fact, if left untreated, it can lead to the dreaded cottonmouth. Which without immediate hydration, can turn into full blown Old Man's Ass Mouth.

Rule Number Next One: It is not cool to criticize people's weed in front of them. Example, "Hey, no thanks. I'd rather smoke horse puke than your low quality shit weed. Thanks for offering though." Don't do that. it hurts.

Rule Number Yellow: Hey don't push anyone to smoke pot with you. It's cool to offer weed to your new neighbor, but if they refuse, back off. In other words don't do this. "Hey, Mr. Johnson, this is your new neighbor. You're about to smoke pot whether you want it or not. So get over here and suck on my bong!" Don't do that. It's pushers that make marijuana illegal. And politics. And Laws. Mostly laws.

Rule Number Unicorn: Pass the j clockwise, always clockwise. (That means the direction a clock goes.) (Blogger's note: Remember, as Beyonce says, TO THE LEFT, TO THE LEFT).

Rule Number %: Never Bogart. But if you supply the weed you can Baccall us anytime. (If you didn't get that, ask an old person to explain it to you.)

A Rule That Rhymes: When smoking a bowl with other smokers, remember this saying: Don't be mean, leave some green.