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There is something stuck somewhere that is causing this, could be a corrupted registry entry but as you already found out there is so many possibilities that could be wrong. Just trying to give you a couple directions to go and hope it helps.
But really, thanks. I'll be seeing what I can do in terms of the registry. That sounds like it'll definitely lead somewhere.
@schnitzel: I actually didn't do that specifically. I deleted all my games and then reinstalled them. I even tried uninstalling them individually via 'Programs and Features'. BUT that's smart. Install, delete the game folders, launch, it reinstalls files, and it runs. That sounds smooth, so I'll check it out, too. Thanks for the advice.
I'll update this if either works out. Thanks again for the input!
Windows Memory Diagnostic - bad/failing memory module?
Check Disk - bad/failing sectors on drive?
Overheating? - make sure all fans are clean & working, heatsinks are seated properly and reseat your memory module(s) & processor if socketed. Let the system completely cool down and see if things are any better from a 'cold' boot.
Just some ideas, the above can cause a multitude of problems that may not appear related.
Anyway, on topic...
I ran both CHKDSK and WMD. Both of those done as thoroughly as I could. (Only did WMD on Standard and Basic, I didn't have the patience for Advanced but will run overnight.) I also do some routine maintenance on my computer, overheating and hardware aren't issues.
But I really wouldn't have thought of those first two things, I always forget to keep up with them.
Still not working though. Props for the suggestions, was worth a shot.
So far, that includes... HL2 (+EP1 and EP2), TF2, CS:S, (ESPECIALLY) GMOD, Synergy, Empires, EYE, Portal and a few more I can't name off the top of my head. Strangely enough, I haven't had problems with L4D+L4D2. It happens to those ones, but not frequently. I mean, I've managed to run DayZ for ArmA II and Magicka without those causing my PC issues, and they lag and sputter like they should for a weak system.
The only hardware change this system has ever had was the graphics card, and it's been working fine since I installed it (which is also when I bought the computer). Power requirements may be draining, I've had that issue on another system, but it doesn't SEEM like it. I'll double check at some point.
But yeah, as far as I can tell, this only ever happens with source engine games. I reeeeally wish I could take the easy way out and reinstall Windows.
Will look into power drain possibility.
Try launching in offline mode?