Posted: April 1, 2014
Creepypasta Attempt #1:
I got on Steam and saw this game on the first of April and bought it because I thought it was an April Fool’s joke.
Creepypasta Attempt #2:
I got on Steam and saw this game on the first of April and bought it because I’m an idiot.
No, no, no.
Creepypasta Attempt #3:
I got on Steam and saw that I had been gifted a game. I didn’t recognize who sent it and the message along with it went as so:
“Dear Withering Soul,
You are lost in your pitiful life. Test your limits.”
I downloaded it with hesitant fingers clenching the mouse with building tension. The game started and I was thrust into a dark forest. I clicked a birdhouse, then a doll, then A SPOOKY .JPG CAME OUT! I was now by a crying woman. I clicked a swing set, then the woman, then A SPOOKY .JPG CAME OUT! Later I went to Hell for some reason and there were three hanging, farting dead people and A SPOOKY .JPG CAME OUT!
This was Real Horror Stories Ultimate Edition. I hated this game. I hated it. I hate, hate, hated it. I don’t hate it because it scared me, but simply because it bored me. The only thing scary is that the creator is getting money for this bull. You loosely swing between random places and have things pop out at you. What people forget is there is a difference between being horrified and being startled. This game startles you for brief seconds. Which can be okay, but I didn’t get startled at all. This game TRIES to startle you for brief seconds. The only problem is that you’ll be bored to tears between the “scares,” so you just don’t get scared. My shoulders jumped once and I think it was because a fly landed on my arm.
I can’t recommend this unless you saved up money from selling cards and you don’t feel like buying DLC. Don’t tell all your friends not to buy this because they’ll go out and do it anyway. Just ignore the game and forget about it. That is the worst thing you can do about terrible horror games: feel nothing and see them as irrelevant.